When INFPs are angered, they aren't usually quick to react. They initially attempt to filter their feelings through their Introverted Feeling judgment center. Introverted Feeling is often misunderstood by people who are new to type. They assume that because the word “Feeling” is used, that Fi revolves around emotions.
If you're an INFP, you avoid reaching a place of anger and will do your best to hold everything inside to avoid making a scene in public.
INFPs don't have anger issues. They are fantastic at quelling their negative emotions and focusing on more positive behaviors. However, INFPs may become angry when they are dismissed, around a bully, or if they feel betrayed by someone close to them. INFPs are masters of emotional regulation.
#1 – They Appear Quiet and Distant
INFPs tend to be on the quiet side, but there's usually a whimsical warmth that shows up anyway. But when they are stressed and overwhelmed, they appear more distant, detached, and stoic. Usually they are absorbed in thoughts, trying to sort out how to handle what's plaguing them.
Under extreme stress, though, the laidback and caring INFP becomes inflexible, rigid and efficiency-driven. Instead of being open-minded and compassionate, they may become harshly critical of themselves and those around them. They may fixate on accomplishing tasks and lose touch with their creative streak.
If an INFP was traumatized in childhood, they may develop a strong dependence on their therapist. This is because deep down they long for a mentor who respects them for who they are and gives them the guidance they need. At the same time, INFPs tend to be sensitive to interference.
Dishonesty and pretentious behavior turns off the INFP tremendously. As mentioned above, the INFP will have a very open mind towards nearly anyone – but being yourself, being honest, and being authentic are extremely important to them.
The INFP – Shallowness
Shallow conversations, relationships, and activities turn INFPs off because they see them as a waste of time. People who focus more on appearances or material possessions than on substance and meaning are very unappealing to INFPs.
One of the reasons why INFPs disappear or ghost people is because they need time to process what's going on in their heads before responding. INFPs are often deep thinkers who need quiet time alone to reflect on things that happened throughout the day.
However, if INFPs can't escape the shallow plane quickly, they will lose interest in the relationship (even though they may continue being friendly to that person — we hate being rude).
They are known for being empathic and will mirror others' emotions and feelings. The intensity of their own emotions can sometimes become overwhelming for them, and so they may cry a lot more frequently. This is a sign that an INFP needs some time alone to rest and recharge so that they can put themselves first.
INFPs are very sensitive to interpersonal tension and tend to avoid conflict. They have trouble letting go of hurts and often hold grudges. Because they see only the good in those they care about, they run the risk of being disillusioned and disappointed easily.
As Intuitive Feelers, they're fascinated by human nature and wish to understand you at a deep, emotional level. So, if an INFP really likes you, they'll go out of their way to talk to you and engage in a meaningful conversation. It's their way of telling you that they care and want to know you better.
INFPs will be more focused on the different interpretations of what people are arguing about. They will make their opponent question everything and consider connections that were missed. They win an argument by showing their opponent an alternative way of looking at things.
Weaknesses that are typically associated with the INFP personality type include... Having difficulty accepting disappointment or failure. Taking criticism too personally. Struggling to share about themselves.
This can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation if they don't find a close enough bond with someone who they can share their authentic self with. Taking Things Personally – INFPs tend to take criticism very personally and can have a hard time seeing constructive criticism for what it is.
INFPs may seem like feelers in disguise. They may not exude emotion and enthusiasm all the time, but they care deeply and intensely. They may not open up to most people about how they feel, what they feel, or what impacts them, but they know and that's what matters to them.
It's easy to see why. We aren't particularly assertive, and tend to be soft-spoken, so it's easy to get drowned out or ignored. We also think differently than many types, so others might just not 'get' what we're trying to say.
They can be overly-sensitive, quick to take offense, and insistent that only their views and values are valid. They can be resentful and isolative, only allowing people into their lives that adhere to the same ideals and values.
Inflexible or purposeless routine is also likely to bring a bit of stress to INFPs. They generally dislike strict schedules and prefer to make things up as they go. Being boxed into a routine may make them feel like they have no freedom, which will take away from their natural energy. INFPs also tend to dislike crowds.
INFP: Decisiveness
Decisiveness is a turn-on for INFPs. Making decisions isn't an INFP's strength. Sometimes it's because they usually spend a lot of time analyzing different options and exploring all the possibilities in order to come up with a conclusion that would make sense for everyone involved.
Prefacing an insult or critique by saying “don't take this personally” will only make INFPs feel belittled and irritated. INFPs are more than happy to get constructive criticism, but it needs to be done in a way that isn't patronizing. Zen habits has an amazing article on how to give constructive criticism kindly.
What Do INFPs Do When They're Angry? A lot of things can influence how an INFP will express their anger, but typically they tend to withdraw. Retreating from the world in order to process their feelings is an essential part of the healing process for INFPs.
INFPs are imaginative and visionary, and they enjoy channeling their values into creative inventions. They easily see how things can be changed or re-invented and made better and tend to pursue life-paths that will make things better for the “underdogs” of the world.
INFPs get embarrassed when they are put on the spot and are expected to react emotionally to something. This could involve something like being given a really exorbitant gift or having a surprise party thrown for them.