An excessively nice person might never be really known on a deep level or taken seriously. Their preferences might be over-ridden, and they could be neglected. It can even impact your job. Being too accommodating can make you a bit invisible, because you never stand for anything.
Being 'too nice' can be a disadvantage if you don't set boundaries at work and can even have negative consequences for your work life. Some of these negative consequences can be that you are not compensated for your work, you get taken advantage of, you get overlooked and you could get more tasks dumped on your plate.
Sometimes, too nice really is a red flag. Someone who seems too nice could actually be love bombing you, an early warning sign of abuse, for instance. "Although on the surface, you may feel someone is too nice, it's actually your intuition trying to give you a subtle warning that something is off," Nikhade says.
Sociotropy, more informally known as people-pleasing, is defined as the tendency to value relationships over personal independence. Often, people fear losing relationships and alter their behaviour to avoid conflict, even if it has a detrimental impact on their own wellbeing.
Human brains are hardwired for empathy, because we associate those near to us – friends, partners, family members – so closely with our own selves, say psychologists at the University of Virginia. It stands to reason, then, that being kind to cheer someone up makes us feel good too.
Being nice also requires you to give to others, sometimes at the expense of your own needs. You may be depleted in some way. This state means fewer psychological resources are available for others. Some examples include stress, low mood, and fatigue.
Niceness is a decision, a strategy of social interaction; it is not a character trait. People seeking to control others almost always present the image of a nice person in the beginning. Niceness is not a character trait.
adjective. over·nice ˌō-vər-ˈnīs. Synonyms of overnice. : excessively nice: such as. : excessively pleasant or agreeable.
When people tell you that you are “too nice”, they are really saying something else. It's sometimes easier for others to label the problem as being “too nice”, rather than to bluntly tell you that you are coming off as: Insecure, dependent, needy, clingy, or desperate.
Everyone around knows it, and so do you, but instead, you say they're great. Proverbs 27:6 tells us, “The wounds of a friend are trustworthy, but the kisses of an enemy are excessive.”
"It's nothing", "no problem", "no worries", "don't mention it", "not at all" or "sure thing": These are all common responses and most people wouldn't think twice if you use one of those.
Often, being too nice in a relationship is a sign of a deeper insecurity. It may stem from our attachment style or from experiences we had in childhood. Being too accommodating in a relationship may also be a sign of low self esteem or codependency in relationships.
You should never trust people who are too nice because that's often their strategy for getting something from you or controlling your decision-making process. They might be just pretending to be friendly so that they can get close with you and take something from you or control your decisions.
phoney. adjective. informal someone who is phoney pretends to be friendly, clever, kind etc.
Performative kindness (aka insincerity)
Those who are extroverted, sensing, feeling, and judging are among some of the most likable people, Sameera Sullivan, matchmaker and relationship expert, tells Best Life. They can be identified by their "warm disposition and big hearts," she says.
INFJ is the rarest personality type across the population, occurring in just 2% of the population. It is also the rarest personality type among men. INFJ stands for Introversion, Intuition, Feeling, and Judging. This unique combination is hard to find in most people.
Being genuine and honest is essential to being likeable. No one likes a fake. People gravitate toward those who are genuine because they know they can trust them. It is difficult to like someone when you don't know who they really are and how they really feel.
People who are always nice tend to hold in negative emotions, often resulting in depression, anxiety, and addiction. Those who are always nice may periodically act out or even collapse from exhaustion.
The first reason is that it makes them feel better about themselves. When someone is putting another person down, they are actually making themselves feel superior. It's a way of boosting their own ego. Another reason people give others a hard time is because they are jealous.
"Doing something nice for someone also gives the brain a serotonin boost, the chemical that gives us that feeling of satisfaction and well-being."