The narcissist perceives every disagreement - let alone criticism - as nothing short of a threat. He reacts defensively. He becomes indignant, aggressive and cold. He detaches emotionally for fear of yet another (narcissistic) injury.
A narcissist will get angry when they can't control you because it contradicts their sense of entitlement, contradicts their falsified identity, triggers their suppressed negative emotions, and causes them to go into a narcissistic rage in an emotionally inadequate attempt to regulate their own emotions.
Since rejection threatens both self-esteem and fears of abandonment, a narcissist might react by becoming violently angry, shouting, or calling you names. Dealing with narcissistic rage can be very scary, and it's important to prioritize your safety.
When you don't respond, when you don't react in that way, when you don't perform in the way they want, when you don't agree with them or do something that they find agreeable, whatever opinion that is that doesn't conform to them, a narcissist will take that as criticism. The normal person won't.
Simply put, narcissists hate being ignored. They probably want to make you feel ashamed, regretful, and rattled. They want to be in control and will go to any length to keep feeling empowered. It's critical to understand that a narcissist will not leave you alone the first time you ignore them.
Praise will motivate them to help you if you need them to do so. Dont include opinions about anything. You can say, Im not having this conversation with you.. If you dont respond to a narcissists text, they feel ignored, and this can send them into a narcissistic rage.
Gaslighters/narcissists are extremely sensitive to rejection. Any perceived slight can throw them into a tailspin. Many times, gaslighters/narcissists will be out for revenge. One of the most common ways gaslighters/narcissists attack those who reject them is by subjecting them to public humiliation.
They will often deploy a variety of narcissistic relationship patterns such as manipulation, charismatic, and exploitational tactics in order to ensure that their own needs and wants are met. As a spouse, you may be the subject of their manipulation and abuse, while your partner treats everyone else positively.
When a narcissist realizes your refusal to be controlled, they panic because their demands are no longer met. They'll become coercive, manipulative and potentially aggressive. On the other hand, they might become superficially charming to lure you back in before they start controlling you again.
You may feel like you want to prove or convince the narcissist of something, but that will not work. Simply agreeing to disagree gives the narcissist the knowledge that their opinions and perspective was heard.
Type As can also be dangerous to narcissists
Although they can be targeted, type A people can also become a narcissist's worst nightmare. One of the most important defenses against dark personalities is having strong boundaries yourself, and type A people are usually aware they have the right to build them.
There will be no mature fighting or resolution if you are arguing with a toxic or narcissistic individual. You will be unable to have a calm and mature argument with them. They will often become extremely upset and aggressive. More times than not the conversation will shift to nonsensical rants.
Red Flags When You're In a Relationship With a Narcissist
Downplays your emotions. Uses manipulative tactics to “win” arguments. Love bombing, especially after a fight. Makes you second-guess yourself constantly.
Rage: Narcissists are insecure and when there is a narcissistic injury to their sense of self, they will rage. This is often done with yelling and insults hurled at the victim. During these rages, the narcissist can be the most damaging in their words.
The most effective weapon to fend off narcissists is self-love. When you love yourself, it is more difficult for the narcissist to manipulate you and get under your skin. It will hurt them to know that you do not need them, that you are better off without them, and that you love yourself exactly as you are.
It is common for people with a narcissistic personality disorder to regret discarding or losing someone, but it does not mean what you might think. If they feel regret, it is not because they hurt you. It is for losing something that they value. You are a possession, not a real person.
Essentially, the narcissistic person's message is one of extreme disapproval to the degree that the silence renders the target so insignificant that he or she is ignored and becomes more or less nonexistent in the eyes of the narcissistic person.
Narcissistic silent treatment is when a narcissist ignores and avoids interacting with you to punish, control, or communicate that they are unhappy with you. It's a form of manipulation, and this toxic behavior can negatively impact the victim psychologically and emotionally.