Separations, disagreements, and rejections—real or perceived—are the most common triggers for symptoms. A person with BPD is highly sensitive to abandonment and being alone, which brings about intense feelings of anger, fear, suicidal thoughts and self-harm, and very impulsive decisions.
A person with borderline personality disorder is often unable to trust their own feelings or reactions. Lacking a strong sense of self leads to a sense of emptiness and sometimes a sense of being non-existent, which is another reason BPD hurts so much.
People with BPD need validation and acknowledgement of the pain they're struggling with. Listen to the emotion your loved one is trying to communicate without getting bogged down in attempting to reconcile the words being used. Try to make the person with BPD feel heard.
People with BPD are often affected by several types of distorted thinking. Some ways that a person with BPD thinks include having paranoid ideation, dichotomous thinking, and dissociation. If you believe that you might be experiencing thinking associated with BPD, talk to your doctor.
Show confidence and respect.
It is important that support people approach the relationship in a way that promotes trust and respect, which can be helpful and healing to a person with BPD. Although you may feel you know what is best, provide the person with BPD the opportunity to make decisions for themselves.
In extreme cases, physical, verbal, or emotional abuse may occur. This can make dating someone with BPD challenging. It is important to remember that while having a relationship with a person with BPD can be challenging, they are not intentionally trying to hurt you.
The condition seems to be worse in young adulthood and may gradually get better with age. If you have borderline personality disorder, don't get discouraged. Many people with this disorder get better over time with treatment and can learn to live satisfying lives.
So, what exactly does the BPD break up cycle look like? It can look like fear of abandonment, distrust of a partner, cheating, lack of communication and self-blame. It can look like idolizing a partner, confusing strong emotions for passion, anxiety and overreacting to interactions perceived as negative.
Separations, disagreements, and rejections—real or perceived—are the most common triggers for symptoms. A person with BPD is highly sensitive to abandonment and being alone, which brings about intense feelings of anger, fear, suicidal thoughts and self-harm, and very impulsive decisions.
Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is one of the most damaging mental illnesses. By itself, this severe mental illness accounts for up to 10 percent of patients in psychiatric care and 20 percent of those who have to be hospitalized.
A person with BPD typically has an unstable self-identity. Sometimes, lies help them bridge the gap between their true identity and the one they've adopted for the time being.
By allowing them to feel their feelings and bearing witness to their pain without judgment, you are showing them love while avoiding a fruitless conflict. At the same time, don't attribute all of your loved one's feelings to borderline personality disorder.
People with BPD see their favorite person as someone they can't live without. “People with BPD often find themselves placing their attention on one specific person. This person may be a friend, family member, or romantic partner.
People with BPD have a lot of difficulty in relationships, but that doesn't mean they're incapable of love. Unstable emotions often lead to unstable relationships, while black-and-white thinking may make a person with BPD push people away when there is evidence their partner has flaws.
Avoid misusing alcohol or caffeine, as these also can intensify mood instability. BPD sometimes includes symptoms of self-harm or substance abuse. Since food does have an impact on moods, it's important to incorporate mindfulness into your eating.
We all see the world through different eyes, but a person with borderline personality disorder has an abnormally distorted view of themselves and the environment around them. People with borderline personality disorder feel intense, uncontrollable emotions, which can make them very distressed and angry.
I don't mean to be so impulsive
These strong feelings often lead me to impulsive actions, such as binging and purging, self-harm or going on a spending spree. It is during these times of intense emotions that I often do things I regret afterwards, before I calm down and apologize if I've done something to hurt others.
Because of their overall pessimistic demeanor, they can easily feel slighted and may express this aggressively or hold it in and build resentment. Those with this type of BPD tend to view people in “black and white” terms (known as BPD splitting), so they are likely to hold onto a grudge after feeling insulted.
For someone with this type of BPD relationship, a “favorite person” is someone they rely on for comfort, happiness, and validation. The relationship with a BPD favorite person may start healthy, but it can often turn into a toxic love-hate cycle known as idealization and devaluation.