This is where the term “favorite person” comes from in the borderline community. There is usually one of two people that we absolutely idolize and want to spend all our time with, and if they are busy and can't spend time with us we tend to get angry and feel abandoned.
A favorite person is the center of attention of an individual living with BPD. This means they consider this person as a trusted friend, confidant, and counselor all wrapped in one. Dr. Roberts notes that the person with BPD demonstrates an “anxious-preoccupied attachment style.”
For a person with BPD there are significant fears of abandonment and they will attach to a favourite person and rely on this person for emotional validation and security. Their favourite person becomes the source of their comfort and devotion.
A favorite person is one person in a BPD sufferer's life that they cannot function without. In most instances, favorite persons are crushes, partners, friends, or other people who the pwBPD interacts within their life (teachers, for instance).
Results found in a 2014 study found the average length of a BPD relationship between those who either married or living together as partners was 7.3 years. However, there are cases where couples can stay together for 20+ years.
An “FP” (or Favorite Person) is a person who someone with mental illness relies on for support, and often looks up to or idolizes. Common with borderline personality disorder (BPD), it's often that someone has a minimum of one FP, but a person can have many.
Someone suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) may start giving you the silent treatment. Manipulation, difficulty controlling and regulating emotions, and the consequences of fear of abandonment are the most common causes of this behavior.
Often, the borderline person is unaware of how they feel when their feelings surface, so they displace their feelings onto others as causing them. They may not realise that their feelings belong within them, so they think that their partner is responsible for hurting them and causing them to feel this way.
People affected by BPD often have highly unstable intimate relationships. Usually of above average intelligence, they tend to fall in love easily, sometimes without getting to know the person.
Be grateful that you had your favorite person, for as long as you did. Think about what experiences and lessons you have learned from that person. Practice personal gratitude for the time you had together, rather than demonizing that former favorite person. When you are in a better state of mind, you will move on.
Even the slightest touch or movement can create immense suffering.” Breakups are hard enough, but for those who identify with symptoms of BPD and have no “emotional skin”, losing the love and companionship of their favorite person can leave them feeling such unbearable pain that life itself is too much to bear.
Yes, BPD (Borderline personality disorder) people often change their favorite people, for example, they admire a group of musicians but at the same time, they also like another music group. For this reason, their favorite person often changed.
People with this syndrome constantly reach out to their favorite person, especially when they are not responding to their texts and calls. As people experiencing FP feel the need to be constantly connected to their favorite person, they might become upset or anxious if they show signs of losing contact with them.
The only pairing I have seen that works well for and is healing for people with BPD is when they find a partner who is emotionally present, consistently faithful and loyal, unconditionally loving, but also sets boundaries. People with BPD can find rejecting partners and codependent partners fairly easily.
Recognize in your loved one's abilities and help them realize their own potential rather than taking on their challenges for them. Let them know that you support them and believe in them. Help them take steps to become more self-sufficient, not less. Of course, this does not mean ignoring legitimate crises.
If someone has a borderline personality, they will always push people away, in fear of getting hurt. This is extremely difficult and painful for the people around them, as the sufferer can seem cold and angry, attention seeking, or not wanting help.
A person with BPD may also be very physical and eager to spend a lot of time with their partner. At the same time, people with BPD are sensitive to abandonment or rejection. Many are hyperfocused on perceived signs that a romantic partner isn't happy or may leave them.
Separations, disagreements, and rejections—real or perceived—are the most common triggers for symptoms. A person with BPD is highly sensitive to abandonment and being alone, which brings about intense feelings of anger, fear, suicidal thoughts and self-harm, and very impulsive decisions.
Punishment and revenge are central to the manifestation of what Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is and means when it comes to relationships. The struggle of those with BPD relationally, is rooted in a proverbial no-win situation.
Findings showed that 73% of BPD subjects engaged in violence during the one-year study period, and frequently exhibited co-morbid antisocial personality disorder (ASPD) and psychopathic characteristics. Reported violence was mostly characterized by disputes with acquaintances or significant others.
Quiet borderline personality disorder, or quiet BPD, is a classification some psychologists use to describe a subtype of borderline personality disorder (BPD). While many symptoms of BPD can manifest outward (such as aggression toward others), individuals with quiet BPD may direct symptoms like aggression inward.
One study found most women with BPD (68.7%) experienced frequent breakups and reconciliations within their relationships, and over 18 months, almost 30% of them permanently broke up with their significant others. On average, couples broke up about once every 6 ½ months but tended to get back together.
Enable the person with BPD by protecting them from the consequences of their actions. If your loved one won't respect your boundaries and continues to make you feel unsafe, then you may need to leave. It doesn't mean you don't love them, but your self-care should always take priority.