Above all, he fears rejection, a feeling so painful, that it is almost like annihilation, like being completely destroyed. So he slithers around any direct conflict. Many men suffer from some degree of this conflict-avoidant pattern. That's because guys tend to have much more difficulty in dealing with stress.
Recent statistics indicate that the number one fear for men is acrophobia, the fear of heights. Acrophobia is, in fact, one of the more common phobias for both men and women.
You're afraid to articulate your needs
Fear of rejection in relationships is perhaps the most common fear there is and many of us nod and smile away when we'd rather be articulating what's not working for us and what we really need.
Men's fears of women can be hidden but powerful. Men can be afraid of being dominated, controlled, or abandoned by women. Men can be afraid of being inadequate with women.
And during one of our recent panel discussions before thousands of women, Miss Kay summarized a huge dose of marriage reality into so tight a capsule that any of us could swallow it and keep it down. She said that men possess two great fears: the fear of being found inadequate. the fear of being controlled by a woman.
Performance anxiety plays a herculean role in sparking intimacy fears in men. A man who feels that he will not be able to perform well, or fears that the other person might react badly, is plagued by an intimacy disorder. Addictions can also play with a person's mind without him even realizing.
One of the main reasons why men are afraid of commitment is because they are afraid of being abandoned. They may have had a previous relationship. It is where their partner ended up leaving them. As a result, they develop a fear of being in another relationship where they might get hurt again.
We reflexively become angry, agitated, and even hostile at even the sight of a powerful woman expressing herself. When a woman doesn't just fall in line, that woman can't be controlled — she cannot be an instrument, she's a free subject of her own making and her own ownership, and many men cannot handle it.
These fears are generally rooted in past childhood experiences and triggered by the here-and-now of adult relationships. This leads to confusion if a person focuses on examining the relationship solely based on present-day circumstances. Fear of intimacy can also be linked to anxiety disorders.
The Decision Phase is arguably the hardest phase.
Keep in mind that you don't need to think about marrying the person in order to enter this phase. But after two years or so together, the initial magic starts to fade and the only way to make a relationship work is by putting in the effort to make it work.
The most common fears within relationships may include: intimacy. inadequacy. abandonment.
1.Agoraphobia
Probably the most crippling of all phobias listed is a fear of wide, open spaces. People with agoraphobia often have a hard time feeling safe in any public place due to a lack of control.
The top 10 fears found in the 2022 survey suggest that Americans' fears center on five main topics: corrupt government officials (number 1), harm to a loved one (numbers 2 & 4), war (numbers 3, 5, & 10), environmental concerns (numbers 6 & 9), and economic concerns numbers 7 & 8).
“A man will commit when he feels a deep connection with a woman that he doesn't feel with anyone else; when he finds a lover who is also his best friend that makes him feel special and unique,” Tripp says.
When a man hurts a woman he loves, he feels emotions such as anger, guilt, frustration, self-loathe, fear, etc. Although he may not express his feelings confidently, a man will show signs he is sorry for hurting you or signs he knows he hurt you.
Listen actively. Avoid withdrawing when they put up a wall. Instead, be present without infringing on their personal space. Remember that their challenges with intimacy are not your fault, so don't take it personally or act defensively.
He Is Afraid Of His Feelings For You
Maybe this is the first time he is experiencing such intense feelings for someone, and this scares him. He might be scared of the fact that he will disappoint you or doubtful if he is ready to commit. Being afraid of feelings and love is the number one reason men pull away.
1. Lack of Honesty. Often when we think of honesty, notably honesty in marital relationships, we think of a very tangible “where were you last night” kind of honesty. While this is obviously critically important, there are many other kinds of dishonesty that can destroy marriages.
Stop mommying him around by telling him what he should or should not do, what he should wear or should not wear, his eating habits, the kind of people he chooses to hang out with, or even his shopping habits. When it comes to things that annoys guys so much, this is a big one.
A controlling partner may have experienced some trauma at an earlier stage in life. This has caused them to need and seek control in their relationships. Other controlling people need to control because they have insecurities and low self-esteem. It's almost as if they need to prove something.