Narcissistic partners usually have difficulty really loving someone else, because they don't truly love themselves. They are so focused on themselves that they cannot really “see” their partner as a separate person. They tend to only see the partner in terms of how they fill their needs (or fail to fill their needs).
Narcissist Women: In Relationships
They crave attention and being the object of desire. Narcissist women often have ex-partners that they keep ensnared, may instigate love triangles to feel validation, and are prone to cheating both emotionally and physically. Narcissist women are often very seductive.
Many people love narcissists and have maintained successful relationships with them. They may need to acknowledge their behaviors and take steps to rein them in, though. If you're in a relationship with a narcissist, a healthy connection may not be possible.
In fact, narcissists are often attracted to strong, confident, and self-assured women. While this may seem counterintuitive, it is important to realize that the narcissistic traits of grandiosity and confidence are really a mask for deep insecurity.
They are condescending and believe they are better than others. They engage in excessive attempts to seek attention and admiration from others. Their self-esteem may be overly dependent on others and/or fluctuate with their mood.
Narcissists view partners as trophies under their power and may expect partners to show deference and adoring behavior throughout the relationship. Manipulation of a partner is emotional abuse, and narcissists resort to some pretty low behaviors if they feel that they are losing their hold on a partner.
Sexual narcissists prioritize their own sexual satisfaction and needs, lack empathy for their sexual partners, expect frequent praise on their sexual performance, and feel entitled to sex when and where they want it.
Simply put, anything that jeopardizes their basic needs for superiority can quickly irritate them. If you want to know how to infuriate a narcissist, you can look no further than giving them nothing. But you can also stand up for yourself, set boundaries, and refuse their gaslighting strategies.
It's possible for a narcissist to be faithful in a relationship, but unlikely. Narcissists tend to prioritize their own needs and desires over their partner's and have few qualms about engaging in infidelity if it serves their own interests.
Narcissists tend to be focused on themselves and their own needs, and they don't typically value commitment or loyalty. In many cases, a narcissist may only be committed to acquired things, such as money, or a certain lifestyle – but not another person.
Signs a Narcissist Loves You
They will treat you with respect. They will listen to your feelings. They will respect your boundaries. They will take responsibility for their actions.
She may become jealous if you talk to other people, or even if you give someone a compliment. This is because, in her mind, she believes that she deserves all of your attention and admiration.
Red Flags When You're In a Relationship With a Narcissist
Downplays your emotions. Uses manipulative tactics to “win” arguments. Love bombing, especially after a fight. Makes you second-guess yourself constantly.
Specifically, female narcissists are less entitled, impulsive, aggressive, and more empathetic than males diagnosed with NPD. Female narcissists also may display certain distinct traits such as a preoccupation with their appearance or being more prone to envy and jealousy than males.
Not all narcissists are cheaters, but rates of infidelity are higher among them, which may concern people who are in a relationship with a narcissist. Your partner may show less interest in you, signs of inappropriate online behavior, flirt with others in front of you, and become defensive when you question them.
The answer can also be no in that a true narcissist doesn't really miss you as a person; they miss how you made them feel. You were a source of narcissistic supply and provided them with positive feelings. They miss having someone around that they can control and squeeze that supply from whenever they need it.
Fear of being alone – Narcissists are skilled at destroying their partner's social circles and relationships with family members. The prospect of leaving may equate to a feeling of being truly alone; Fear of reprisals – The narcissist may have created a culture of fear and anxiety in their partner's life.
"Female narcissists utilize neglect or guilt as a form of control," she says, "whereas male narcissists are more likely to utilize power and status as a form of control." Another way both male and female narcissists gain control and affection is through codependent people.
Narcissists can be grandiose when it comes to self-serving, unnecessary spending (i.e., buying a designer watch they can't afford), but skimp on the essentials (i.e., food, health expenses, basic household items).
Narcissists are more likely to wear expensive, flashy clothing, have an organized, neat appearance requiring a lot of preparation, and (in females) wear makeup and show cleavage.
"But with a narcissist, you'll always feel like you're trying to entertain them. Unfortunately for a narcissist, she says, the next person will always end up being boring because time breeds familiarity, requiring the narcissist to look for something new.