A toxic sibling relationship is a relationship that is unbalanced in its power dynamic and may involve sibling abuse and dysfunctional sibling rivalry. Sibling estrangement can be caused by parental favouritism, having immature parents, parental or sibling abuse and psychopathy.
She's constantly complaining about her own misfortunes.
If your sister is constantly talking about her misfortunes and comparing them to your life repeatedly, she's resentful of you and is putting her anger about her situation onto you.
If you feel like you hate your sister, you're not alone. It is common for siblings to fight, which can lead to rivalry and hatred over time. Hatred for a sibling can set in at any age, in childhood or adulthood. It can intensify over time or dissipate as the years pass.
Monopolizing conversations; demanding constant attention. Disrespecting boundaries; feeling entitled that they needn't comply with others' wishes. Betraying confidence. Launching “campaigns” against others: making themselves look perfect and their sibling look like the “crazy” one.
Emotional abuse between siblings is common but difficult to research. The impact of emotional abuse in any form should never be underestimated. Name-calling, belittling, teasing, shaming, threats, intimidation, false accusations, provocation, and destroying a sibling's belongings are all forms of emotional abuse.
The main causes of sibling rivalry are about what kids see as fairness. Your kids strive for equal treatment. "Three things are typically at the root of most sibling rivalry: kids feeling they're getting unequal amounts of attention, degrees of responsiveness and severity of discipline," says Donna Housman, Ed.
In fact, the Scriptures are full of teachings instructing us to leave relationships with wicked or evil people, to be separate from them, to shun, outcast, and purge them from our midst. (1 Corinthians 15:33, Proverbs 13:20, Psalm 1:1, Proverbs 6:27, 1 Corinthians 5:11, 1 Corinthians 10:13 – these are just a few).
Many people who behave in a toxic manner have been through trauma themselves, and instead of dealing with that trauma, these people start exhibiting toxic traits. These people usually don't know how to process trauma and stress in a healthy manner, so they end up being unpleasant around people.
While it's most common in romantic settings, gaslighting can happen in any kind of relationship where one person is so important to the other that they don't want to take the chance of upsetting or losing them, such as a boss, friend, sibling, or parent.
Until your sister acknowledges the harm she's caused and the lack of emotional awareness she's mixing into your relationship, taking some space is absolutely fine. Cutting off a family member with these toxic traits is justified, but you might consider leaving the door open to reconciliation later on down the road.
Gaslighting by a family member is a confusing form of emotional abuse where one person uses manipulation to gain control over another by distorting their own sense of reality.
Can sibling abuse lead to PTSD? Abuse is abuse, no matter who it's carried out by. Sibling abuse, just like other forms of abuse, can lead to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Your sibling may constantly demand your attention and admiration and react with outrage if you do not respond as they desire, instilling a deep belief that you are responsible for their emotional well-being. In some cases, the narcissist may even use physical or sexual violence against you.
Narcissism tends to emerge as a psychological defence in response to excessive levels of parental criticism, abuse or neglect in early life. Narcissistic personalities tend to be formed by emotional injury as a result of overwhelming shame, loss or deprivation during childhood.
Sibling estrangement is an outgrowth of "drifting apart and taking different paths. The more painful (break-up) is when it comes out of a conflict or many conflicts," Kennedy-Moore said. Often cutting off the relationship arises when one sibling "finds it toxic to have that person in their life," Kennedy-Moore said.
Sibling alienation occurs when one adult sibling wants to push aside another. While sibling alienation can occur at any point, one sibling may be especially tempted to alienate another in order to gain control of care-taking or inheritance outcomes with aging parents.