The Mayo Clinic provides the following examples of signs and symptoms of unresolved grief: Intense sorrow, pain, and rumination over the loss of your loved one. Inability to focus on anything aside from the loved one's death. Extreme focus on reminders of the loved one or excessive avoidance of reminders.
Unresolved grief: Grief characterized by the extended duration of the symptoms, by interference of the grief symptoms with the normal functioning of the mourner, and/or by the intensity of the symptoms (for example, intense suicidal thoughts or acts).
“Delayed grief often occurs after the busyness and responsibility of the surviving family member slows down,” Smith explains. For example, someone may not be able to process the loss of their spouse or parent at first because they're busy handling funeral arrangements or feeling anxious over sudden financial pressures.
In most cases, people with unresolved grief deny or avoid it. They hold onto their loved one and refuse to accept the loss, hindering the healing process.
The most recent versions of standard official diagnostic guidelines include a diagnosis of “Prolonged Grief Disorder" in DSM 5 and ICD11. This is the condition we have been calling complicated grief. ICD11: In 2018 the World Health Organization approved a new diagnosis of Prolonged Grief Disorder.
But there is no timetable or timeline for grief. It is completely normal to feel profoundly sad for more than a year, and sometimes many years, after a person you love has died. Don't put pressure on yourself to feel better or move on because other people think you should.
Delayed grief is an experience of feeling deep sorrow, long after experiencing the death of someone you are close with. It is when our emotional reaction to loss doesn't happen right away. Somehow the reaction is postponed. Pushed off for months, years, or even decades.
Disenfranchised grief, also known as hidden grief or sorrow, refers to any grief that goes unacknowledged or unvalidated by social norms. This kind of grief is often minimized or not understood by others, which makes it particularly hard to process and work through.
Hostility, irritability, or agitation toward someone connected to the death. Withdrawal and detachment from family, friends, or at school. Lack of trust in others. Problems sleeping (fear of being alone at night)
But, the feelings often do not go away after the situation has passed. These emotions become emotional information which stays in our bodies as trauma. So, where are these negative emotions in our bodies? Emotional information is stored through “packages” in our organs, tissues, skin, and muscles.
Sometimes a person may begin to feel “stuck” in their grief and become very depressed or anxious. Or worse, they may begin to feel suicidal, as though not going on is a real option. If this is the case for you or someone you care about, it is important to seek help.
Grief that is withheld and not recognised can have a negative impact on us emotionally as well as physically. If we unconsciously delay the grieving process and withhold emotions, this can manifest itself in physical ways such as headaches, difficulty sleeping, ailments and stomach problems.
Depression
This is the longest stage because people can linger in it for months, if not years. Depression can cause feelings of helplessness, sadness, and lack of enthusiasm.
Even many years after a loss, you can feel sadness when confronted with reminders. But it's important to take steps towards healing, even if they're small.
Experiencing grief is natural and necessary, and the vast majority of people suffering the loss of a loved one experience it for a predictable period of time—generally six to twelve months.
Often the second year is the hardest as that's when the real grief work might begin. This is the time when you may be ready to face your grief head on and deal with any issues that are holding you back. If you're not ready yet though, don't feel guilty. There is no deadline and everyone grieves in their own time.
Masked grief is grief that the person experiencing the grief does not say they have –– or that they mask. This can be common among men, or in society and cultures in which there are rules that dictate how you must act, or appear following the loss of someone close to you.
Complicated grief increases the risk of physical and mental health problems like depression, anxiety, sleep issues, suicidal thoughts and behaviors, and physical illness.
Unhealthy grief prolongs suffering, interrupts normal activities, or prevents life from being lived to the fullest.
Complicated grief, sometimes referred to as unresolved or traumatic grief, is the current designation for a syndrome of prolonged and intense grief that is associated with substantial impairment in work, health, and social functioning.