At its core, jealousy in relationships is about low self-esteem. When you don't feel confident in yourself or feel that you deserve the love of your partner, you project those insecurities onto your partner.
Jealousy is often rooted in insecurities and fears that a person may not even realize they have. These could include fear of oversimplification, fear of inadequacy, fear of abandonment, fear of being replaced, and fear of being judged.
Jealousy might also kick-start the body's stress response. Enter an overflow of stress hormones, spiked blood pressure, and an increased heart rate.
Jealousy, at its core, is a byproduct of fear, fear of not being good enough, fear of loss.
Openly discussing your jealous thoughts with a partner or a close friend can help you understand and manage the feelings of jealousy. Being able to honestly voice your thoughts can have a cathartic effect, and this act alone can help reduce the hold they have over you.
Feeling jealous is a signal that someone else might be putting a relationship you have and rely on at risk — and you may need to do something about it to either save that relationship or find what you're getting out of that relationship somewhere else. “Jealousy is hard-wired in all of us,” Jalal says.
Because jealousy can bring with it feelings of fear that are so intense that your body doesn't know what it's supposed to do with itself, it activates the amygdala in the brain, which causes a gut reaction.
Jealousy summons a whole host of negative emotions in its wake. It hijacks your thoughts and carries them into dangerous places. It is as though a demon (Shakespeare's “monster”) has perched on your shoulders and is guiding you deeper and deeper into hell.
review that there are many reasons for why someone tries to induce jealousy, including someone just wanting to be taken out more by a mate, testing the relationship, doing it just for fun, to get rewards (like gifts), and wanting to gain self-confidence or a feeling of power.
Research shows that jealousy is often fueled by insecurity, not love for a partner. The best way to deal with a jealous partner may be to reassure them of your affection. Working on your own confidence and having good communication with your partner are key to coping with jealousy.
People can become jealous for a variety of reasons. Often, jealous feelings stem from communication issues, low self-esteem, loneliness, or, in relationships, differing interpersonal boundaries.
“Jealousy is the highest form of flattery.”
Delusional jealousy (also known as morbid jealousy) is one type of delusional disorder, and as the name implies people with jealous delusions are completely convinced that their spouses or romantic partners have been unfaithful.
It is natural to feel jealous every once in a while, but in the long-term, it can have a negative impact on the individual and their relationships. Common symptoms of jealousy include resentment, frustration, impatience, anger, and general unpleasantness.
Research has shown that jealousy can be a sign of feeling deeply in love with a partner. It may contribute to relationship satisfaction by signaling emotional commitment and investment. It may contribute to relationship stability by prompting partners to further nurture their bond and actively protect their union.
Many people plagued by jealousy find themselves with feelings of bitterness, emotional instability, anxiety, and depression. Driven by insecurity they often present as needy and in constant need of reassurance, which wears on a relationship and can lead to its demise.
Jealousy may be driven by low self-esteem or a poor self-image. If you don't feel attractive and confident, it can be hard to truly believe that your partner loves and values you. Other times, jealousy can be caused by unrealistic expectations about the relationship.
Psychotherapy is often an effective treatment for jealousy. A person who experiences jealousy might benefit from working with a therapist to process painful emotions and reframe negative, damaging thoughts that affect their behavior.