Haphephobia is an intense, irrational fear of being touched. It is different from hypersensitivity, which is physical pain associated with being touched. People with haphephobia feel extreme distress over the thought of being touched. This anxiety can lead to physical symptoms like nausea, vomiting or panic attacks.
Some people also suffer from haphephobia, which can make hugs overwhelming for them, by spiralling into nausea, hyperventilation, or even, panic attacks — while it's causes remain unknown, experts have hypothesized it as a result of trauma.
Negative experiences with touch in the past
Negative associations [with] all kinds of negative experiences leave their mark on the body. When trauma is stored in implicit memory in the body, people don't like to be hugged or touched. It makes them feel out of control and vulnerable,” Zolbrod says.
“People who have higher levels of social anxiety, in general, may be hesitant to engage in affectionate touches with others, including friends.” And the fear of someone 'reaching out'—literally and figuratively—can make that discomfort even worse, she warns. There's also a cultural component to being hug avoidant.
Low Self-Esteem. If you generally lack self-confidence and don't feel good about yourself, physical contact may be even more uncomfortable for you. This is because being touched by someone else can make you feel exposed and vulnerable in a way that magnifies any negative feelings you have about yourself.
Haphephobia is an intense, irrational fear of being touched. It is different from hypersensitivity, which is physical pain associated with being touched. People with haphephobia feel extreme distress over the thought of being touched. This anxiety can lead to physical symptoms like nausea, vomiting or panic attacks.
Other reasons why one partner may begin to avoid being touched by the other – If they are not experiencing much pleasure from coupled sex, they worry that it will lead to a fight, or if they have body image or self-confidence issues.
Some people don't like being touched for different reasons. It might be a cultural thing. Some have deeper psychological issues, like past physical or sexual abuse. Either way, it can be perfectly normal.
Compliment the person on their positive traits or appearance. Giving compliments is a classic way to show affection for someone without touching them. Try telling the person what you like most about them or noticing something new about their appearance when you see them.
There might be a repressed childhood experience or trauma from past relationships and/or sexual encounters that have left you emotionally scarred. You might want to take care of that through therapy or profound introspection. Do you really crave romantic/physical contact or do you only think you do.
Some people just don't like to have their physical space invaded — they may feel threatened by another's proximity or vulnerable if they allow someone to show them warmth or affection. Some people may be mild “germophobes” (like the comic, Howie Mandel) who don't like touching other people's bodies.
Don't impose hugs
“If someone looks like they're going to put their hand out, just follow. You don't have to grab them and go, 'Hey, I'm a hugger,' and make everyone feel uncomfortable.” Also, “if someone says no to a hug, don't dwell on it, just move on. The golden rule is treat people as you want to be treated.
Sometimes children don't want physical affection because they're not in the mood, and other times it could be a specific person they don't want to cuddle. It could just be one of those things, there's no reason why but your child just doesn't want to give them a kiss goodbye.
The adjective unaffectionate comes from affectionate, "fond or loving," combined with the prefix un-, "not." Definitions of unaffectionate. adjective. lacking affection or warm feeling. synonyms: detached, uncaring unloving.
It's a cultural thing…
But many cultures around the world don't hug to do this. In countries like India, Nepal, Thailand and Japan, a bow is customary rather than a hug. In India and Nepal, a bow, alongside saying “Namaste” is considered a sign of respect and gratitude.
Different Boundaries & Personality:
It is not something that they are used to or comfortable with. Personality also plays a role in people's level of comfort with showing affection. Introverts may feel less comfortable with expressing affection, while extroverts show affection often and with ease.
If it's a casual situation, try going in for a high five, or a fist bump, instead of clasping the other person's hand. Cutting the hugger off before they reach you is an effective, last-minute solution for avoiding an upcoming hug. Don't feel guilty or ashamed about cutting off a hug before it even starts.
Smiling at the other person, playing with your hair, and maintaining eye contact are great ways to flirt without physically touching them. If you do want to show your affection through a touch, try sitting close to them and giving a light touch on the arm or hand to start.
Mood swings are common in people with ADHD. People with this disorder can be hypersensitive, too. That means sensations, like touch, that may feel normal to another person can feel too intense for someone with ADHD.
A sensitivity to touch can be due tosensory processing disorders, emotional and mental health issues, and physical conditions. Whether you are an adult, adolescent or parent of a child with tactile sensitivity, getting an evaluation and exploring possible reasons for the issue is the first step towards healing.
People with hypersensitivity are oversensitive to things in their environment. If you've ever been irritated by the sound of a dripping tap or a shirt that's too tight, or you flinch if someone touches your arm, you'll have some idea of what sensory hypersensitivity feels like.
"When someone gets too close to us ... the part of the brain known as the amygdala is triggered as we (potentially unconsciously) feel we might be attacked." Obviously, if you recoil or flinch at your partner's touch, it's a clear indicator that you're uncomfortable around them.
What Causes Intimacy Issues? There are many root causes of intimacy disorder. Most can be attributed to traumatic childhood experiences such as verbal, physical or sexual abuse, emotional neglect, substance abuse in the home, the death of a parent, or exposure to or experience of rejection.
In many cases, feeling disgusted by your husband's touch points to a resolvable issue, such as an emotional disconnection within the marriage. However, it is also possible that your lack of desire for his touch is because of a more serious issue, including physical and/or psychological abuse in the relationship.