Codependency or Self-Love Deficit Disorder (SLDD) is a problem of distribution of love, respect and caring, within close, and/or romantic relationships. Codependents give the preponderance of love, respect and caring (LRC), with the hopes of having it reciprocated.
Narcissists exhibit higher levels of self-esteem than average people but continue to internally beat themselves up for their insecurities. Meanwhile, a person who shows self-love also demonstrates high self-esteem but uses their insecurities and flaws to be a better person.
There is a large body of psychological research that shows self-compassion and self-love do have a strong impact on our mental health and our emotional state, both in terms of decreasing anxiety, depression, anger and loneliness and also increasing support and encouragement for ourselves.
However, research indicates that unlike Narcissus staring at himself reflecting in the pool, many narcissists actually aren't in love with themselves after all. Quite the opposite, in fact. Much of the time, a narcissist's behaviour isn't driven by self-love – rather, self-hatred.
As Frew puts it, toxic-self love can be reductive because “it glosses over deeper emotions and needs, and can also bring about a sense of isolation and disconnection from others.” It's hard to determine when exactly toxic self-love became such a big part of our lives.
According to research, people with narcissistic personality disorder have reduced gray matter volume in areas of the brain related to empathy and increased activity on baseline images in brain regions associated with self-directed and self-absorbed thinking.
As long as you are in love with yourself while loving others, not being selfish, and see a scope of growth within yourself, you're walking in the right lane. Self-love to an extent is healthy. Once it turns into a massive obsession, might lead to narcissism.
Our Negativity Bias
Growing up with not enough acceptance and too much shame, we may cling to our shortcomings, past failures, and poor decisions. We minimize the good things about ourselves and our positive qualities. Scientists tell us that our brain has a negativity bias.
Adopting Self-Love as a Coping Skill
We choose self-loving ways of coping with our emotions when we choose to face our emotions. Self-love means allowing ourselves to feel emotions. When we accept ourselves and our feelings, we're practicing self-love.
Myth: Self-love makes you selfish, narcissistic and arrogant. Truth: Self-love makes you more positive, confident and resilient. In truth, narcissism and arrogance are both signs of a deep lack of self-confidence, self-acceptance, and self-love.
Self love is not selfish, it's essential.
It's good for you, for your health, and at the end of the day, it is beneficial also for everyone around you. You will see that if you love yourself more, you will feel better, you will have more opportunities and even your relationship with others will improve.
Selfishness is the act of taking from others, using others, and even abusing others, in order to get what we want without consideration for their wellbeing. Self-love is taking care of our needs and wants without taking advantage of others in the process.
It means accepting your emotions for what they are and putting your physical, emotional and mental well-being first. So now we know that self-love motivates you to make healthy choices in life. When you hold yourself in high esteem, you're more likely to choose things that nurture your well-being and serve you well.
The study found that people with stronger white matter connection from their medial prefrontal cortex (responsible for self-knowledge) to their ventral striatum (involved in reward sensation) showed high long-term self-esteem.
Signs of low self-esteem include: saying negative things and being critical about yourself. joking about yourself in a negative way. focusing on your negatives and ignoring your achievements.
85% of the world's population are affected by low self esteem. Self-esteem is often referred to as self-worth or self-respect. When individuals have low self-esteem it can be difficult for some individuals to feel a sense of worth or confidence in whom they are.
Narcissistic personality disorder — one of several types of personality disorders — is a mental condition in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others.
Put simply, we develop self-love by getting to know ourselves, while we develop self-compassion by being gentle with ourselves. This process of self-knowledge and self-discovery is a large part of what it takes to fall in love with ourselves.
A monumental weakness in the narcissist is the failure to look internally and flesh out what needs to be worked on. Then, of course, the next step is to spend time improving. The narcissist sabotages any possibility of looking deep within.
Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental health condition in which people have an unreasonably high sense of their own importance. They need and seek too much attention and want people to admire them. People with this disorder may lack the ability to understand or care about the feelings of others.
Reduced frontal cortex thickness and cortical volume associated with pathological narcissism.
Self-care is the deepest form of self-love: a talk with Anna Wiedemann.