The dating age rule to determining a socially acceptable age difference in partners goes something like this: half your age plus seven (40 = 20 +7 = 27) to define the minimum age of a partner and your age minus seven times two (40 = 33 * 2 = 60) to define the maximum age of a partner.
In short, research seems to indicate that in many cultures, an age gap of 1 to 3 years is considered ideal — but some researchers suggest even a relationship with an age gap of less than 10 years will bring more satisfaction. Still, numbers rarely tell the full story when it comes to love.
For those who'd like to put a number to things, usually, a gap of 1-7 years can be considered an acceptable age difference between adults. People whose ages are within 1-3 years typically do not see much of an age difference, while years 4-7 might begin to feel a little bit more pronounced.
The “creepiness rule” states that the youngest you should date is “half your age plus seven.” The less commonly used corollary is that the oldest you should date is “subtract seven from your age and double it.” According to this rule, society should accept a 50 year old man dating a 32 year old woman.
A relationship age gap bigger than 10 years often comes with its own set of issues. “While there are always exceptions to rules, a good rule to remember is that dating someone more than 10 years older will present challenges now or later that add to the preexisting challenges any relationship has,” he says.
Fitzpatrick says that the general age gap usually accepted by society is about ten to twelve years, after which you'll probably start raising some eyebrows; "Once one partner is old enough to be the other's parent, people tend to frown."
How much of an age gap is too much? There is no hard and fast rule on what kind of an age gap is or isn't acceptable in any relationship. While couples typically tend to have an age gap of around one to three years in many cultures, each individual will have a different comfort level that they feel is right for them.
It is a very serious offence to engage in sexual activity with anyone under 16 years of age, even if you are in a relationship and they agree, as the law says that they cannot consent. It is still illegal if you are both under 16 years of age.
In Australia, the average age gap between opposite-sex couples is 1.8 years. This statistic is a telling indication of the reality of age difference between couples in Australia.
When this question comes up in conversation, someone inevitably cites the half your age plus seven rule. This rule states that by dividing your own age by two and then adding seven you can find the socially acceptable minimum age of anyone you want to date.
Across many different studies, a shorter age gap or a longer age gap is associated with worse health and developmental outcomes. Research suggests that an age gap of 27 to 32 months may be associated with the best health outcomes for mother and child.
Being attracted to older men is totally normal, and even though stigmas around age-gap relationships exist, you should follow your heart. Typically, young people like the experience and maturity of older men. After years of dating around, older guys tend to know what they want.
Romantic couples with a large age gap often raise eyebrows. Studies have found partners with more than a ten-year gap in age experience social disapproval. But when it comes to our own relationships, both men and women prefer someone their own age, but are open to someone 10-15 years their junior or senior.
"Half-your-age-plus-seven" rule
An often-asserted rule of thumb to determine whether an age difference is socially acceptable holds that a person should never date someone whose age is less than half their own plus seven years.
The common belief is yes. Nevertheless, a study in Finland on age differences in partners shows that men might state interest in younger women but actually end up with women more or less their age.
Most people don't think age-gapped relationships are a big deal. A 2008 study found that couples only face societal disapproval when their age difference is over ten years—I'm in the clear! Woo! Even big age gaps tend to become less taboo as people get older, and it certainly matters at what age the couple met.
Many people assume that age-gap couples fare poorly when it comes to relationship outcomes. But some studies find the relationship satisfaction reported by age-gap couples is higher. These couples also seem to report greater trust and commitment and lower jealousy than similar-age couples.
If you are 16 years old and above, you can legally have sex (or do another sexual activity) with another person who is 16 years or older as long as you both agree to it.
While in many circumstances it is perfectly legal for an adult to have consensual sexual contact or intercourse with a 16-year-old, there are some circumstances where it is not. Most often, it comes down to the nature of the relationship between the two individuals.
The legal age for consensual sex varies between 16 and 17 years across Australian state and territory jurisdictions (see Table 2). For other sexual activities, the criminal legislation relating to different types of sexual behaviours and interactions varies across Australian jurisdictions.
The rule suggests the younger person in a relationship should be older than half the older person's age plus seven years in order for the relationship to be socially acceptable.
A man can also marry a woman who's older or younger than him. What really matters is that they love and understand each other. When it comes to marriage and relationships, age is no longer a number!
The truth is, there is no ideal or appropriate age gap in a relationship. Whether it's a 20 year age gap relationship or a 5 year age gap relationship, there will be both challenges and benefits to your situation.
“Even if the age gap is small, like 4 to 5 years, different levels of maturity can be observed,” says Brandy Porche, a licensed professional counselor with MindPath. “When there is a significant difference in age, like 10 to 15 years or more, life experiences can be vastly different.”
Experts note that as you two become closer, age becomes just a number, and the gap between you two won't matter as much. Ask him questions about his past, his childhood, and his family. Check in with him about his emotions, and make sure he feels safe enough to open up to you.