The correct answer: Walk right up to this one: Call the host, thank her for the invitation, and tell her that you're sorry but you can't make it (3). You don't need to give a reason or make up an excuse. You're also in no way obliged to send a present — this is a shower, not a wedding.
A simple, "I'm sorry, I will not be able to attend Suzy's shower," should suffice. Remember to thank the hostess for the invitation. If it is a close friend or relative, a reason needs to be stated. Remember to keep your response short, sweet and to the point.
My advice is to consider that perhaps, if you are in a season of struggle, you can decline to attend the baby shower. Give yourself permission to say, “Thank you, but I won't be attending.” Yes, even if the shower is for your dearest friend or family member.
Polite ways to decline an invitation
I am honored; however, I will not be able to attend because I have another engagement that day. Sorry, I will not be able to attend because I am occupied on that day. I appreciate your invitation, but unfortunately, I have a family meeting that will prevent me from attending.
A polite host will never ask why you will not be in attendance. A simple but vague "I have a prior commitment" should suffice if your nosy host presses you for an explanation. Pair your deflection with sincere thanks for the invitation. Even if you don't want to attend, receiving an invitation is always nice.
“Oh, thank you so much for thinking of me! Unfortunately I won't be able to make it, but thank you for the invitation!” “Oh, that sounds lovely, but I won't be able to make it. But have a great time!”
“Now is not a good time. Thanks for offering to come over, it just doesn't work for us right now. “ If you would like to see them at another time. . . “I'll give you a call or text you next week to set something up.” Don't give any excuses or share any stories.
Let the hostess and at least send a card. An invitation is just that — a request. You are not required to attend any sort of party. Maybe you have a prior engagement or it's too far to travel or you are sick or don't handle crowds well.
Be clear. “I don't want a baby shower because it will make me uncomfortable, and I'd rather spend the late-term pre-birth day doing something else.” Just tell them you feel superstitious and feel it is bad luck to have a shower for a yet to be born child.
There's no set length of time for a baby shower. If you consider all that might be included — a meal or light refreshments, games and opening gifts — about two hours is a good guideline for in-person baby showers. You don't want to exhaust the expectant parent.
When declining money from relatives, it's important to remain polite yet firm. Start by explaining the circumstances and your needs and plans to gently explain why you need to refuse their generous offer politely. This way, they can feel acknowledged and respected even if their offer is declined.
If you decline something or decline to do something, you politely refuse to accept it or do it. [formal]
“I'm so sorry I won't be able to make it. I hope you have a wonderful time!” Often with social anxiety, the goal is to push through angst by actually attending events you ultimately would like to attend. But in this case, it's just as important to push through your angst in saying no.
Use an “I feel” statement to tell them how their behavior hurt you: “I feel uncomfortable when you show up unannounced, and I'd like to step back from spending time together.” Try a short, direct statement for someone who won't take the hint: “I can't spend time around someone who won't respect my boundaries.
Remember, the main thing when declining an invitation is to be polite and tactful. Even if the event isn't important to you, the fact that you have been invited to it shows that the host would like to share the event with you.
There's no need to worry about turning down an invitation you have already accepted, as long as you give sufficient warning and have a valid excuse.
TL;DR: The closer you are to the expecting parents, the more you'll spend on a baby shower gift. Typical gifts range from $25-$200 and more. Whatever amount you choose to spend, putting in extra effort to make the gift pretty and sentimental goes a long way.
Maybe, but It's not necessary. A shower invitation does not carry the obligation of sending a gift if you can't attend.
Who plans and hosts a baby shower? According to tradition, baby showers should be hosted by a friend or distant relative (like a cousin or an aunt) instead of a close family member. This custom is believed to have developed in order to avoid the appearance that the family was simply on a mission to collect gifts.
In general, I would say that by the age of 8 or 9 years-10 at the latest-most children have developed enough of a sense of personal boundaries and body space that they no longer want to shower with a parent or bathe with a sibling of the opposite sex.
You don't have to be traditional if it's too expensive for you, get some food, drinks, and just invite people. If you plan something they will come (hopefully with gifts too). Asking your spouse to throw you a baby shower is a great alternative if none of your friends and family follow through.