They like people who are strong In fact, narcissists prefer to target someone who is strong-willed, and who has talents or characteristics they admire, because they believe it makes them shine too.
While everyone has a type, people with extreme narcissistic tendencies are usually attracted to certain traits, including self-doubt, excellent hygiene, and helpfulness.
It is a misconception that narcissists target weak, vulnerable people because they will be easier to manipulate. They actually go for the exact opposite. They look for people who are confident, successful, attractive and strong-willed.
It might sound counter-intuitive, but if you have low self-esteem, you might be attracted to partners who confirm your low self-esteem by putting you down. Unfortunately, we accept the love we think we deserve. On the flip side, you may be attracted to narcissistic partners because of their confidence and charm.
Type As can also be dangerous to narcissists
Although they can be targeted, type A people can also become a narcissist's worst nightmare. One of the most important defenses against dark personalities is having strong boundaries yourself, and type A people are usually aware they have the right to build them.
Indeed, we knew from prior work that narcissists fantasize about having power over others, and that their sense of self-worth fluctuates based on others' respect and admiration. To understand what narcissists want, it is critical to examine what makes them feel good and bad.
Narcissists are attracted to people whom they can control or manipulate. By being assertive, you'll be less attractive to narcissists because they can't feed off your supply. It's important to be yourself and stay true to your values, even if that means you won't attract every person out there.
In fact, narcissists are often attracted to strong, confident, and self-assured women.
They will often deploy a variety of narcissistic relationship patterns such as manipulation, charismatic, and exploitational tactics in order to ensure that their own needs and wants are met. As a spouse, you may be the subject of their manipulation and abuse, while your partner treats everyone else positively.
Narcissists are attracted to certain types of people. Rather than weak, vulnerable people, they tend to go for the strong-willed and talented. They are also attracted to people who reflect well on themselves.
A narcissist will target a victim who will forgive them over and over for being hurtful. Typically, people who stay in relationships with narcissists are kind and forgiving. They tend to overlook the bad, seeing mainly the good in other people. So, they will always find excuses for a narcissist's abusive behavior.
A narcissist will idealize their new partner and put them on a pedestal. This is more than just thinking they have found the “right” one (although that is part of it). Rather, they feel they have found perfection, and so, they pour their affections on their new partner.
When narcissists fall in love, they become obsessed with being adored and admired by their partners. They may shower them with compliments and gifts or attempt to manipulate them through grand gestures of affection.
Bottom Line. Narcissists can sometimes be helpful and caring. However, more often than not, they only pretend to have these qualities.
The narcissist in this position will take advantage of the empath and see their compassion as weakness. The attraction between the two is profoundly due to their complementary desires, unhealthy as it may be to seek attention and validation from one another.
Many people with narcissistic personality disorder appear to be in a successful and happy marriage. Their social media posts show them laughing together over a special dinner, walking hand-in-hand along the beach, and even renewing their marriage vows in front of friends and family.
Narcissists can love, but this superficial and momentary affection serves as a way to get what they want from others. While their role as caring partners, parents, or friends may appear genuine, a lack of empathy and devotion to themselves renders narcissists unable to develop meaningful relationships.
Narcissists use sex and the pretence of emotion to control others. They like to be in control, and often derive pleasure from giving or withdrawing sex or affection to this end. 10. Narcissists are not really capable of feeling guilty, and feel no shame about lying if they think that it will get them what they want.
Attention-seeking behavior—positive or negative—is essentially narcissistic supply. Wanting attention, accolades, and validation are not inherently narcissistic. We all need to feel heard and accepted, but narcissists crave this attention constantly.
Most narcissists enjoy an irrational and brief burst of relief after having suffered emotionally ("narcissistic injury") or after having sustained a loss. It is a sense of freedom, which comes with being unshackled.
To narcissists, ordinary people (i.e., nearly everybody around them) aren't worthy of attention, so being ordinary would leave them unworthy of the spotlight and left to suffocate.
Rejection, humiliation, and even the tiniest of defeats can shake them to their core. This leaves narcissists wholly focused on their image. They believe that how they are viewed by others, and how they view themselves, will shield them against realities of life that few of us like but most of us come to accept.