The most common reason isn't tension; it's just that friendships fizzle out, both experts say. Friends move, get a new job, start a family and may just gradually stop talking to each other. One study found we lose about half our friends every seven years, Franco says.
The most significant factors in ending a friendship were discovered to be, broadly, selfishness, being more likely to end friendships with those who looked after their own interest, were not supportive of them, were dishonest, and were taking without giving, among the prime reasons.
Circumstances: Your lives have changed (no longer working together, going to the same school, etc.). Distance: You've grown apart in terms of interests or commitments. Lying: Your friend is deceitful. Negativity: Your friend spends more time cutting you down than building you up.
Sometimes friends simply drift apart; their life circumstances may change suddenly, as in the case of marriage, a new job, moving city or becoming a parent. It's natural when friendships are altered by such life events. However, sometimes you drift apart simply because you're growing in different ways.
So, being too busy, citing excuses, or flaking out on you every time you need help or support is one of the unmistakable signs your friend doesn't truly care about you.
“In adulthood, as people grow up and go away, friendships are the relationships most likely to take a hit,” my colleague Julie Beck wrote in 2015. The older you get, the more effort it takes to maintain connections, because you don't have as many built-in opportunities to see your friends every day.
What is the Silent Treatment? The silent treatment is a refusal to verbally communicate with someone, often as a means of punishment, emotional manipulation, or control. Although this type of behavior is more common in an intimate or romantic relationship, it can also happen with family members, friends, or co-workers.
What are the psychological effects of losing a friend?
It can feel like a literal heartache (Eisenberger, N. I. 2012). You might also feel psychological symptoms of anxiety that include racing heart, rumination, worry, and numbness. The loss of a close friend can spiral us into depression with feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, and helplessness.
“In fact, mental health experts recommend forgiving those who have hurt you to improve your mental health and well-being.” Remember that when healing a friendship, you also need to heal yourself.
One of the biggest challenges when experiencing a friendship ending is not having that person to lean on. Focus on scheduling activities and reconnecting with loved ones (but avoid bad-mouthing your situation to mutual friends). It may also help to reach out to a therapist, who can help you sort through your emotions.
“Toxic friendships happen when one person is being emotionally harmed or used by another, making the relationship more of a burden than support,” says Suzanne Degges-White, author of Toxic Friendships. A bad friendship can increase your blood pressure, lower your immunity, and affect your mental health.
