Avoid dressing in casual clothing, such as athletic wear, tank tops, or shorts. Skip the flip-flops, tennis shoes, sneakers, or boat shoes. Remove the neon necktie, purse, or accessory. Shy away from wearing jeans, even black ones, because they are considered too casual for a funeral.
Wearing dark grey or deep blue is just as appropriate as black, while brown and lighter greys are suitable for the vast majority of funeral services. However, unless specifically requested by the deceased or their family, you should avoid any bright colors such as yellows, oranges, pinks, and reds.
You Don't Have To Wear Black
However, colors like dark grey, dark blue, darker green, white, and beige can be appropriate. If you don't own any black clothing, you may always opt for a subtle hue that is appropriate for formal settings. In addition, stay away from anything with distracting patterns or prints.
Traditionally, funeral etiquette suggests men and women wear black clothing that's conservative and respectful. Black or dark colours are most common, but some cultures expect mourners to wear a less traditional funeral colour.
Bold patterns are not appropriate for funerals and should be avoided. Keep skirts and dresses to the knee or below and avoid bare legs in general to keep your look formal. Avoid anything sparkly, fringed or sequined – this isn't a party.
Usually people say a short prayer by the casket and then proceed to share their condolences with the family. Attending a visitation can be the hardest part for people to attend, because it involves talking to the deceased's family.
Occasionally a funeral director or family liaison officer will advise a family against viewing the body because of bodily injuries or because of decomposition.
Suitable colours
When picking attire, darker colours are equally acceptable as black at funerals for men and women. Dark suits, lighter shirts and darker ties are best. Usually men who are immediate family will wear dark suits, white shirts and black ties.
Not owning traditional funeral attire is no reason to skip a funeral. In fact, we discourage it. You won't be kicked out of a funeral for not wearing a suit, but we suggest wearing an outfit that will blend in rather than start a conversation. (I.e. no shorts, tees and flip flops.)
Funeral outfits: Ideas for women
Dresses or skirts / trousers, jacket and a top, whatever you consider looks smart will be fine. The most important thing is that you feel comfortable about how you look.
Can you wear jeans to a funeral? Bottom line: jeans are not appropriate for a funeral. Unless the family requests them, you should avoid wearing denim to a funeral. However, if it's a casual, outdoor service, you can consider a dark (almost black denim) paired with a button-down shirt and blazer.
For women, adding color can be done through patterns and floral designs. Much like with men's funeral attire, color should be used to subtly accent your outfit. Try to make sure that your outfit does not have overly bright colors or wild patterns that draw attention.
Opt for a conservative, closed-toed pair of heels or flats. The same rule applies for both men's and women's sandals. If your funeral will be taking place in a warm climate, you might be tempted to throw on a pair of fancier sandals or open-toed shoes.
Funeral etiquette says that wearing dark colors to a funeral, including the color navy, is considered a sign of respect for the deceased. Whereas, and in the case of children, some families may request that the guests wear bright colors to celebrations of life—or memorial ceremonies.
So anything from eggplant to navy, forest green, chocolate or deep burgundy are acceptable. We, too, have been to funerals where guests wore bright or pastel colors, and no one made a fuss.
However, there are some funerals where black is specifically prohibited – at the request of the deceased or their loved ones. Alternatively, you might not have black attire to hand in time to pay your respects and so you're in need of alternative ideas.
The appropriate attire for a funeral or memorial service is simple: dress to show respect for the person whose life you are remembering. This means selecting clothes that are more conservative, not flashy or brightly colored. Darker dresses, suits, pants, jackets and sweaters are appropriate.
When attending a funeral, wear attire that would be appropriate for a church service. Nice pants and a collared shirt, a suit and tie, a dress or other attire that is a step above casual is acceptable.
In parts of Germany and in Belgium, it was long customary to cover mirrors with a white cloth because it was thought that if a person saw his or her image in a mirror after a death in the household, that person would die shortly.
Dress Pants and Dress Shirt
You don't need to wear a suit to a funeral. This is a common misconception, but you can actually wear a variety of formal clothing as a man. Wearing dark dress pants or slacks is very appropriate. Pair your dress pants with a dress shirt, preferably a button-down.
Can you wear jeans to a funeral? The most common answer is that jeans aren't considered appropriate funeral etiquette unless requested by the family. However, dark, unembellished jeans paired with a shirt, tie, and blazer for men or a blouse and a blazer for women can be appropriate for a casual service.
Typically, legs are covered in a casket because of swelling in the feet that makes fitting shoes difficult. When swelling is not present, the legs may still be covered at a funeral due to cultural preferences, the type of casket used, the size and condition of the body, and aesthetic considerations.
They might close their eyes frequently or they might be half-open. Facial muscles may relax and the jaw can drop. Skin can become very pale. Breathing can alternate between loud rasping breaths and quiet breathing.
One of the wildest innovations is “living funerals.” You can attend a dry run of your own funeral, complete with casket, mourners, funeral procession, etc. You can witness the lavish proceedings without having an “out-of-body” experience, just an “out-of-disposable-income” experience.