8 Triggers of a Narcissist's Rage
They feel that they've been criticized, even if the critique is constructive or said kindly. They're not the center of attention. They're caught breaking rules or not respecting boundaries. They're held accountable for their actions.
Deep-Seated Fear of Rejection / Being Unimportant – This is the core of narcissistic rage. Many narcissists are constantly hounded by the insecurity that people may not see them as the privileged, powerful, popular, or “special” individuals they make themselves to be, and react intensely when their fears are confirmed.
Someone experiencing narcissistic rage may feel that someone else or an event in their life is threatening or may injure their self-esteem or self-worth. They may act and feel grandiose and superior to others.
More often, narcissistic rage is an intense emotional response accompanied by hurtful comments and actions. On the outside, it may look like someone's out of control or they're out to “get you.” On the inside, they may feel intense pain and vulnerability and a significant need to regain control.
When you don't depend on anyone to make money and you use your abundance to take care of yourself and not predators, you will always have the ability to control your own future. This is power, and pathologically envious narcissists are often turned off by it because it means they cannot easily control a victim.
In a survey we conducted among 400 survivors of narcissistic abuse, we found that the average duration of a single narcissistic rage episode is three hours. We also found that the average duration of narcissistic rage from a narcissist who was experiencing multiple episodes is five-and-a-half days.
Summary: For most people, narcissism wanes as they age. A new study reports the magnitude of the decline of narcissistic traits is tied to specific career and personal relationship choices. However, this is not true for everyone.
Here are some narcissism red flags to look out for: Lacking empathy. They seem unable or unwilling to have empathy for others, and they appear to have no desire for emotional intimacy. Unrealistic sense of entitlement.
Remember: A narcissist's anger is typically either false or fleeting and will likely subside in a matter of minutes or hours — so don't panic! They just need some reassurance that they're still important enough for your attention (even if only briefly).
Examples of narcissistic rage range from intense outbursts and sudden fits of anger, to passive-aggressive acts such as simmering resentment, icy silence, deliberate neglect, or cutting sarcasm.
Narcissism Essential Reads
Sticking around an abusive narcissist who has repeated episodes of narcissistic rage means staying in an abusive relationship. If you are in this type of cycle with a narcissist who doesn't believe they need to change, your only option is to avoid them and their uncontrollable outbursts.
It is important to note that overall narcissism scores generally declined from age 18 to age 41. So, when a life experience is associated with higher levels of a facet of narcissism at age 41, it means that having this life experience led this facet of narcissism to decline less than expected.
There are no medicines specifically used to treat narcissistic personality disorder. But if you have symptoms of depression, anxiety or other conditions, medicines such as antidepressants or anti-anxiety medicines may be helpful.
Narcissistic collapse happens when a person with narcissistic personality disorder experiences a failure, humiliation, or other blow to their secretly fragile self-esteem. Depending on the type of narcissist, collapse may look different and happen more frequently.
Given the excessive demands placed on others in their relationships, they can often feel challenged and eventually angry. Injury to Esteem – Injury to the self-esteem of the person with narcissism can induce feelings of shame or failure.
Narcissistic rage can last for a long time. As some of the most self-loathing people on the planet, narcissists have a ton of internalized rage so in a sense, narcissistic rage never ends.
Narcissistic rage and the silent treatment frequently accompany one another; the silence puts them back in a position of control. What is this? By remaining silent, the narcissist doesn't need to explain themselves, work through problems, or see your side of the conflict.
According to Julie L. Hall, author of “The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free,” narcissists become more extreme versions of their worst selves as they age, which includes becoming more desperate, deluded, paranoid, angry, abusive, and isolated.