Don't try to minimize their loss, provide simplistic solutions, or offer unsolicited advice. It's far better to just listen to your loved one or simply admit: “I'm not sure what to say, but I want you to know I care.” Be willing to sit in silence. Don't press if the grieving person doesn't feel like talking.
It is completely normal to feel profoundly sad for more than a year, and sometimes many years, after a person you love has died. Don't put pressure on yourself to feel better or move on because other people think you should. Be compassionate with yourself and take the space and time you need to grieve.
Am I allowed to cry when I've lost a loved one? Mufti Menk
39 related questions found
What are the 5 stages of grief after a death?
Do the five stages happen in order? The five stages – denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance – are often talked about as if they happen in order, moving from one stage to the other.
What is the hardest stage of grief? Depression is usually the longest and most difficult stage of grief. Depression can be a long and difficult stage in the grieving process, but it's also when people feel their deepest sadness.
If someone is crying, let them cry. Never say things like, "Don't cry" or "This is such a small thing, why are you crying?" They are sharing a vulnerable moment with you, so allow them to express what needs to be expressed without telling them how to feel.
Grief is a natural human experience, and crying is the ultimate healer. We cry at the death of those we know and love as an expression of our grief. Tears can transform suffering and help us pick up the pieces to move forward in our sadness.
Encourage the person to share how they felt emotionally about what is upsetting them. Asking the person will not upset them more but may allow the emotions they've been holding in to be released. Voicing painful feelings can help to reduce emotional distress.
Rubbing your partner's back, or massaging them, can signal to them that you're there for them and that you love them. You can also rub their arm, their hand, or another part of the body. Just make sure you're communicating with your partner and making sure they are comfortable with it.
It's a very healthy and necessary way for children to express their feelings, and we don't need to make them stop. By telling them to 'stop crying' we send the message that their feelings are not important, not valid, silly, and annoying.
As you build a plan, consider the “three Cs”: choose, connect, communicate. Choose: Choose what's best for you. Even during dark bouts of grief, you still possess the dignity of choice. “Grief often brings the sense of loss of control,” said Julie.
People might feel or act differently to usual when they are grieving. They might have difficulty concentrating, withdraw and not enjoy their usual activities. They may drink, smoke or use drugs. They may also have thoughts of hurting themselves or that they can't go on.
Grief can rewire our brain in a way that worsens memory, cognition, and concentration. You might feel spacey, forgetful, or unable to make “good” decisions. It might also be difficult to speak or express yourself. These effects are known as grief brain.
Experts say you should let yourself grieve in your own way and time. People have unique ways of expressing emotions. For example, some might express their feelings by doing things rather than talking about them. They may feel better going on a walk or swimming, or by doing something creative like writing or painting.
