There are different types of loneliness: emotional, and social and existential loneliness.
It's possible to still feel lonely when you're around them, which could actually be a sign of depression or social anxiety. If this is the case for you, it may be a good idea to seek psychotherapy to help with feelings of loneliness, especially if you also feel other symptoms of depression.
A brain imaging study showed that feeling ostracized actually activates our neural pain matrix. In fact, several studies show that ostracizing others hurts us as much as being ostracized ourselves. We can hypothesize that, similarly, loneliness is associated with the pain matrix.
Some research suggests that loneliness can increase stress. It's also associated with an increased risk of certain mental health problems. For example, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and sleep problems. My anxiety and depression isolates me from people and stops me from being able to do the things I'd like to do.
When someone feels lonely they are more likely to try to distract themselves with the other things in their lives. So if your colleague is always talking about their stamp collection, or always flying away on exotic solo city breaks rather than spending weekends at home, they might be feeling alone.
What is chronic loneliness? Chronic loneliness occurs when feelings of loneliness and uncomfortable social isolation go on for a long period of time. It's characterized by constant and unrelenting feelings of being alone, separated or divided from others, and an inability to connect on a deeper level.
Recent research from ReachOut has shown that one in five young people reported feeling lonely 'most of the time' or 'always'. So just because you're feeling lonely, it doesn't mean that you are different or 'weird': in fact, it means that you have more in common with the people around you than you realise.
“The worst kind of loneliness in the world is isolation that comes from being misunderstood. It can make people lose their grasp on reality.”
"Loneliness can change the neurochemistry of the brain, turning off the dopamine neurons, which trigger the reward response, and causing some degeneration in the brain when the reward response is not activated," says Katherine Peters, MD, PhD, FAAN, associate professor of neurology and neurosurgery at Duke University.
Not wanting to be around others can be connected to:
anxiety (other people stress me out so much I have to hide) intimacy issues (I don't want anyone to see the real me) low self-esteem (nobody really likes me anyway) counter-dependency (I don't need anyone I want them to stay away)
What causes loneliness? There is not one single cause of loneliness. Loneliness can often be a result of life changes or circumstances that include living alone, changing your living arrangements, having financial problems, or death of a loved one.
Loneliness affects people in different ways, and for this reason there are four distinct types of loneliness identified by psychologists: emotional, social, situational and chronic.
If you've experienced ongoing feelings of loneliness, it can have negative effects on your physical health. It could lead to weight gain, sleep deprivation, poor heart health, and a weakened immune system. Loneliness can also put your body under more stress than normal.
Personality traits related differently to loneliness depending on gender. Among women, loneliness was associated with higher levels of agreeableness. Among men, loneliness was associated with lower levels of agreeableness, lower levels of conscientiousness, and higher levels of neuroticism.
Isolation is a result of anxiety and depression in that some individuals use it as a self-induced coping mechanism to deal with excessive worry and avoid human interaction.
Hawkley points to evidence linking perceived social isolation with adverse health consequences including depression, poor sleep quality, impaired executive function, accelerated cognitive decline, poor cardiovascular function and impaired immunity at every stage of life.
What are the physical signs of loneliness? Physical signs of loneliness may include cold or flu-like symptoms that linger longer than usual, headaches, body aches, and insomnia or hypersomnia. With loneliness and isolation, attention is more inwardly focused.
There is early evidence that cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), mindfulness and positive psychology can reduce loneliness in later life. These three approaches share key principles. They identify the automatic negative thoughts and feelings which can become overwhelming over time and influence behavior.