Sharing trauma without permission, in an inappropriate place and time, to someone who may not have the capacity to process it. That's trauma dumping. It's become so commonplace on social media, our kids may have come to accept it as normal. It's not.
Consider using a journal to express yourself: Journaling can be great for those trying to stop trauma dumping, because it offers another outlet for processing thoughts, feelings, and difficult experiences. Start journaling and use this as an outlet to vent or 'brain dump' when you're feeling overwhelmed.
While venting can be a natural part of working through our negative emotions, does it become toxic at a certain point? It turns out, it can. And that's when venting becomes trauma dumping — the act of oversharing your emotions in a way that becomes harmful to the other person.
Venting Types
There are three types of venting in your home: venting for supply air, return air and exhaust air.
[Venting is a] coping mechanism that allows a person to rationalize and validate their own fears, concerns, worries, dreams and hopes. If we are not allowed to vent , we end up bottling up our emotions which is detrimental to the human psyche and can end up suffering from it's side effects.
Most of the time, trauma dumping is not purposefully abusive or manipulative. It's more common for a dumper to be so involved in talking about their traumatic experience that they are unaware of how their story is impacting their listeners.
Signs of Emotional Dumping
You feel like your conversations are always one-sided. You feel like your friend or loved one does not listen to you or take your advice. Your feelings are ignored despite being communicated. You feel more like a therapist than a friend or member of the family.
The problem with venting is that it amplifies negativity. The more you think or talk about an issue, the more salient it becomes. It's adding fuel to the fire. Next time you feel like doing so, try focusing on problem-solving or talking about something else entirely.
What is Toxic Venting? Toxic venting feels like an attack on someone's character. Whether you are the one venting, or you're listening to someone else do it, this communication makes the other person out to be “the bad guy.” This type of bad-mouthing becomes an intense form of gossip.
With a therapist, you can take as much as you want (in terms of venting, advice, emotional support, etc.).
Usually foisted upon loved ones, close friends, or unsuspecting acquaintances, trauma dumping can be a problematic red flag for many, setting off alarm bells that a connection is taking on a toxic edge.
Key Takeaways. There's a difference between venting and trauma dumping. Oversharing traumatic or difficult experiences on others in a repeated or unsolicited way can push them away. Recognizing that you might be a trauma dumper can help you learn healthy ways to cope with trauma and maintain relationships.
Emotional dumping is a toxic form of venting. When you emotionally dump you are unaware of both your own emotional state and the state of the listener. Emotional dumping does not include the consent of the listener and ignores containment within time, topic, and objective.
noun. : a place where dangerous waste is left usually illegally.
You worry about their issues more than you do about your own well-being. Your positive feelings for them are starting to disappear. You can't be yourself around them, or you censor your thoughts and feelings. You don't get a chance to ask for their advice or support.
“Trauma dumping without warning or permission can have a toxic and adverse effect on relationships,” explains Fraser. “Sharing deeply personal information can be very uncomfortable for the listener and leave them unsure how to respond. It can also trigger their own trauma, without allowing them space to navigate it.”
There are many different conceptualizations of coping strategies, but the five general types of coping strategies are problem-focused coping, emotion-focused coping, social support, religious coping, and meaning making.
Excessive drug or alcohol use.
Drug and alcohol use can be a slippery slope. Stimulants and depressants may help to numb feelings, pain and subside those negative thoughts that are actively being avoided, but excessive use can lead to severe health complications, addiction, overdose and death.
Venting is a 2-way process: the person venting and the person hearing the vent. As a matter of fact, positive venting can reduce stress, but negative venting can lead to heightened stress and physical health concerns.
When you vent, you let something out, whether it's hot air or your feelings. If you vent your feelings, you let out a strong and sometimes angry emotion and just say what you think. You might vent your rage when your brother once again gets out of doing his chores. You also might vent something to air it out.