One thing's certain: when a person has a nervous, negative or defensive attitude, it's very likely he will fold his arms firmly on his chest, showing that he feels threatened.
It signals a person who is distant, insecure, defensive or anxious. But, Hargrave says that crossed arms do have their pluses too. It's also a comforting (self-soothing pose) pose that can help you to concentrate and stick to a difficult task.
Defensiveness: If you notice someone immediately cross their arms during a conversation, they might feel personally attacked and defensive about what you just said. If you notice their thumbs poking up, this might mean they are feeling “cool” and in control, but still feeling defensive2.
The body language of hand clasping is often misinterpreted. Many people think people who clasp their hands are showing confidence and authority, but that is not accurate. In most cases, clasping both hands together reveals frustration and stress.
Body language: Crossed arms
“The act of crossing your arms utilizes both your left and right brain, creating higher cognitive function,” says Driver. In a 2019 Wired video, former FBI agent Joe Navarro even calls arm-crossing a “self-soothing” gesture, meant to comfort yourself rather than to “block” others.
In many settings, there's nothing wrong with crossing your arms — you may be cold, or it may just be a comfortable resting position. In a meeting, though, you should always avoid sitting with your arms crossed, Goman says. Most people are going to interpret that gesture as you being resistant or closed off.
Long legs weren't shown to be a feature men seek out, but long arms were. "Scanned bodies of taller women who had longer arms were strongly preferred," the Sydney-based researchers write. Upper arm girth played a role too — apparently men are attracted to women with long and slender arms.
It might mean that his arm is tired and he needs to put it in a different position, and that he sees you as an accepting or non-threatening presence, so he uses your chair as his armrest. It could mean that he's a brute and doesn't respect the personal space of others. It could also mean he's into you.
Watch for Their Eye Gaze
Like touch, eye contact triggers the release of oxytocin. When someone is attracted to you, they subconsciously will try engaging in lots of mutual eye contact. They do this to feel closer to you, and because they are interested in you and what you are saying.
It's one of the biggest myths in body language, that crossed arms mean we're feeling defensive or that we're holding something back. “It's not true. It's a myth, but it's perceived that way in the office,” said Driver.
Negative body language is often called defensive body language. This is when your movements and gestures show you are insecure, closed-off, unapproachable, hostile, or disinterested.
Practice Proper Posture: Standing or sitting straight with your shoulders back and your head held up, nonverbally reflects your confidence. It doesn't matter how tall you are, when your posture is straight and aligned, instead of shoulders slumped and head down, you will appear in control and confident.
For instance, if someone is attracted to you, they might flash certain facial expressions, move their chair closer to you, or even exhibit nervous behaviors such as fidgeting.
This may suggest that she likes you and your company. She might even flirt with you to let you know that she's interested. Keep an eye on her gaze; if she looks at you longingly while holding your arm, she's into you.
Hands clasped behind the back is a gesture that can be interpreted in many ways. It can be seen as a display of confidence, superiority, or authority. It can also be seen as a gesture of subordinates, hands behind their back, or even behind the back of someone else.
It means he enjoys touching you and probably likes you. It's an invitation to a hug or a kiss. It's the easiest part of you for him to grab and touch. Pick one.