Originally, the term “helicopter parenting” signals that the parent is among the Baby Boomers (i.e. born between 1940s to 1960s), and the children are members of the Millennial generation (born between 1980s to 2000s).
Helicopter parenting is when parents are over-involved in their child's life, many times as a way to protect their child. This style can result in the child lacking independence, having poor decision-making and coping skills, etc.
The term “helicopter parenting” was first coined in 1990 (Cline and Fay, 2020) to illustrate how parents metaphorically may hover over their children, like helicopters, ready to sweep in and rescue their children from disappointments and painful experiences (Cline and Fay, 2020).
Helicopter parenting is a term used to describe parents who are overly involved in their children's lives. It has become increasingly common among today's college students, with 74% of parents becoming more involved during the college years and 89% helping their child get or improve a job.
The term "helicopter parent" was first used in Dr. Haim Ginott's 1969 book Between Parent and Teenager by teens who said their parents would hover over them like a helicopter. Similar terms include "lawnmower parenting," "cosseting parent," or "bulldoze parenting."
The four main parenting styles — permissive, authoritative, neglectful and authoritarian — used in child psychology today are based on the work of Diana Baumrind, a developmental psychologist, and Stanford researchers Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin.
Lighthouse parenting is a style of parenting which, as its name suggests, considers the parent to be a lighthouse, guiding and supporting their child.
Studies show that children of helicopter parents can experience long-lasting psychological repercussions that can follow them into adolescence and adulthood. In particular, when a parent is overly controlling, children have a harder time learning to manage their emotions and behavior.
“Hovering” over children rather than encouraging autonomy and healthy separation. Excessive anxiety about children failing or getting hurt. Being overly involved in all areas of a child's life (academics, recreational activities, and friendships)
We defined tiger parents as those who practice positive and negative parenting strategies simultaneously. Tiger parents are engaging in some positive parenting behaviors; however, unlike supportive parents, tiger parents also scored high on negative parenting dimensions.
Snowplow parent
If you've offered incentives to a coach to help your child make a team or get more playing time. If you help your child with every homework assignment and project. If you try to have your child's grade changed—especially in college. While "helicopter parents" hover, snowplow parents eliminate obstacles.
Sometimes you have to retract the umbrella to find out what your kids are capable of. Last post, I defined “umbrella parents” as parents who have to do what it takes to get their child's needs served, even if it means looking like a 'smother mother' to other parents.
The parenting style that is best for children is the supportive style. It's a style where you are warm and loving and you're affectionate but you also create structure and boundaries for your children, and you guide their behaviour.
An elephant parenting style is flexible, it allows children to reach out for help, and depend on their parents for comfort whilst young. Elephant parents allow children to be children and seek happiness rather than academic success. This parenting style is filled with warmth, encouragement and protection.
Permissive or 'jellyfish' parenting places few rules or demands on kids and parents seldom follow through on consequences when children do not follow the rules. This parenting approach often results in children who rank low in happiness and self-regulation.
According to Yahoo!, panda parenting is all about “gently guiding your little one, as opposed to shoving them down the parenting path”. In other words, a panda parent is one who gives their kids the freedom to do things their own way.
Neuropsychologist Britt Frank agrees that helicopter parenting can do serious damage to young adults. As she told Deseret News, “Adult children who have overprotective parents can develop depression, anxiety disorders, struggle in relationships and experience difficulty with self-esteem and self-confidence.”
Saba Harouni Lurie, a licensed marriage and family therapist defines lawnmower parenting (also referred to as “bulldozing parenting” and “snowplow parenting”) simply as: “when parents remove obstacles for their kids in hopes of setting them up to be successful.”
Helicopter parenting increases a child's depression and anxiety levels. They are always in look out for guidance, and when left alone, they become too nervous to take a decision. Multiple studies over the past decade summarize the social and psychological risks of being a helicopter parent's child.
Positives of Helicopter Parenting
Their children tend to get lots of support and guidance with whatever is going on in their lives. Helicopter parents of younger children and teenagers also are likely to know where their kids are at all times, which is an important safety consideration.
Snowplow Parenting
Snowplow parents don't want their children to have to deal with hardship. They do everything they can to remove the things that stand in their kids' way. Think of snowplow parents as micro-managers. They want the best for their kids. Therefore, they're different than helicopter parents.
In her article for Motherly, she wrote " Hummingbird parents hover but do not interfere too much in the decisions of their children. They remain physically (or psychologically) nearby to jump in if their children need them, but they try to not make decisions for them or prevent their failures."
Butterfly parenting is also allowing your child to spread their own wings, even if it's in a different direction than you would have hoped for them.
A New York Times blog describes velcro parents as parents who cannot let go of their children. They are super-involved in their children's lives. The problem with this approach to parenting is that their children will take forever to learn how to cope with the tough decisions and situations which life puts in our path.