In the dysfunctional narcissistic family system, the golden child is the most likely to develop a narcissistic personality.
Based on psychodynamic theory, it was hypothesized that firstborn children were expected to score highest, but statistical significance was not found for an association between narcissism and birth order. Further research is urged to investigate personality theory as it relates to parenting style and birth order.
But children who were extremely melodramatic, and who also had parents that ignored or neglected them, spoiled them constantly, or insisted on perfection, were more likely to become narcissists in adulthood.
Your brother's superior status in the family hierarchy was created by your parents, and his sense of identity and self-esteem are heavily dependent on your inferior status in the family. In other words, to feel special he must see you as beneath him; as a narcissist, that feels like survival to him.
Children who grow up with a narcissistic parent tend to suffer from at least some of the following as children and as adults: anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, self-doubt, self-blame, indecision, people-pleasing tendencies, difficulties with emotional intimacy, and codependent relationships.
They play favorites.
Narcissistic parents maintain their power by triangulating, or playing favorites. They may have a golden child who they compliment excessively, for example, while speaking badly about another child in the family.
As such, your sibling may go to great lengths to assert their superiority over you and damage your sense of self to fortify their own; you may be subjected to verbal abuse, belittling, ridicule, and humiliation, both public and private.
Be prepared for the possibility that your narcissistic family member does not respect your boundaries. Those with NPD tend to view themselves as the most important person in the world. Despite your best efforts to reach a compromise, the only effective solution may be to cut off contact completely.
Narcissistic personality disorder affects more males than females, and it often begins in the teens or early adulthood. Some children may show traits of narcissism, but this is often typical for their age and doesn't mean they'll go on to develop narcissistic personality disorder.
The condition is believed to be caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors, including exposure to parental narcissism. Narcissistic individuals are often vain, have low self-esteem, and feel entitled. They may be unsympathetic and have little empathy for others' feelings.
Most recent theories have focused on the link between narcissism and negative childhood experiences, such as physical or sexual violence, neglect, or rejection [10,11].
We demonstrate that narcissism in children is cultivated by parental overvaluation: parents believing their child to be more special and more entitled than others. In contrast, high self-esteem in children is cultivated by parental warmth: parents expressing affection and appreciation toward their child.
Narcissism is one of those traits that appears to be programmed into a person's behavioral repertoire after birth, not before. It's one of those byproducts of consistent pre-verbal interactions that can shape our adult lives, according to current thought.
These people tend to exploit others. If you know someone narcissistic, you may wonder if this is a learned behavior or if genetics plays a role. The answer is that narcissism can be genetic and environmental.
Abusive behaviour
Criticism, looking down on you, bullying, invalidating or gaslighting, and physical intimidation or abuse – all of it happens in toxic sibling relationships. You may be so accustomed to how your sibling has been treating you all of your life that you take it as a given.
Does Narcissism Run in Families? Whatever role genes play in narcissism, NPD definitely can run in families.
Yes, narcissists usually worsen with age. As their physical beauty or influence wanes, they struggle to maintain the admiration and attention they crave. This can lead to an intensification of their narcissistic behaviors, such as manipulation, gaslighting, and emotional abuse.
A golden child's sense of self and their personal boundaries are erased, as their own sense of identity is replaced with the need to live up to their role. Their behaviors and beliefs reflect what their parent expects of them, and they may feel incapable of individuation even in adulthood.
Narcissists are known for their lack of empathy, which impacts all their relationships, including those with their mothers. They are often dismissive, neglectful, or manipulative, using their mother to fulfill their own needs without considering her feelings.
Many narcissistic parents are neglectful or abusive to their children, which can result in lasting negative impacts that continue into adulthood. With treatment, it is possible to heal from narcissistic abuse and learn ways to improve your mental well-being and form healthy, fulfilling relationships as an adult.