The answer is Dopamine. A drug like chemical that pulsates the body in search of pleasure. The dopamine-driven reward loop triggers a rush of euphoric drug-like highs when chasing a crush and the desire to experience them repeatedly.
Chasing someone is a thrill… one that you probably don't get to revel in when you're in a secure relationship. Scientifically, having a crush and falling for someone releases feel-good hormones like dopamine and adrenaline. Part of the chase is a chase for those brain chemicals, to feel those euphoric feelings again.
9 Reason Why We Want What We Cannot Have Include:
We struggle with low self-esteem. We are attracted to the unknown or unpredictability of the other person. We want to fulfill a fantasy. We want to prove to ourselves and others we deserve to have them.
Personality characteristics and behaviors associated with the inability to let go include innate insecurity and childhood abandonment trauma. By understanding why this happens, many people can learn to choose better partners or become more resilient for when loss is inevitable.
According to Helen Fisher and her colleagues, the reason romantic rejection gets us hooked is that this sort of rejection stimulates parts of the brain associated with motivation, reward, addiction, and cravings.
Stop chasing someone who has made it clear they're not ready. Stop chasing someone who is full of excuses. Stop giving your time and energy to someone who has made it clear either with their words, their actions or lack thereof that they are not ready or they simply are not eager to be there fully for you.
Obsessive love can cause a person to fixate on their loved one as though they are an object or possession. This can have many causes, ranging from mental health issues to delusional disorders. Health professionals do not widely recognize obsessive love, or “obsessive love disorder,” as a mental health condition.
Why it's beneficial to stop chasing people. Making the decision to stop chasing people will have positive, knock-on effects in all areas of your life. You will instantly free up time and energy to spend on things and people that enrich your life. In time, you'll become a happier, more confident version of yourself!
Chasing is a depowering state that shoots you down into a lower frequency while attracting is a power-filled state that raises your vibration to a higher frequency and attracts who and what you are meant to have.
So, it's normal if this question is on your mind, if I stop chasing him, will he notice? The answer to that is a strong 'yes. ' Whether he enjoyed it or not, he would notice a change towards him.
It can take a week or even a month before it's clear that someone isn't interested and you aren't making progress. It can also take an hour. Even for someone who is interested, it can still take a long time for them to decide to be with you, even if they like you too.
When a guy gives up chasing you, it could be because he has discovered that someone else is into him. He might have grown tired of waiting around for you and found someone else in the process. If he has been avoiding your calls and texts and is making excuses he might be ignoring you for someone else.
The reality is that in the early stages, an avoidant is likely to feel relieved when you stop chasing. But don't be disheartened. That's not because of how they feel about you. It's simply because they no longer feel like someone is making demands of them.
Sometimes it can feel like you're always chasing something you can't have. It can feel like the more someone pulls away, the more you end up wanting them. This is partly due to our vanity and self-esteem, and partly due to our warped sense of their value.
The same areas of our brain become activated when we experience rejection as when we experience physical pain. That's why even small rejections hurt more than we think they should, because they elicit literal (albeit, emotional) pain.
It also signifies a big change in your life, and maybe even your identity. Even if you know that the relationship wasn't for you, it can still be hard to let go of it. Change is scary. Letting go requires you to move on from something that was familiar and comforting and enter into the uncertain future.
Here are some potential reasons why getting over someone you never actually dated is so hard: The loss of hope: You had hopes and dreams for what the future with this person could be, and now you are grieving the loss of that hope. Beating yourself up about the what-ifs: Was it something you said?
You fear being alone and assume being with anyone is better than being alone. For many, the fear of being alone, and low self-worth, are powerful motivators for remaining in relationships past their expiration date.