Our friends can become fake friends when we begin feeling ambivalent about them. Ambivalent relationships cause the most emotional strain, take the most energy, and are the most toxic. But what is an ambivalent relationship? Here are some questions to self-diagnose your ambivalent relationships.
Thinking you're fake could mean you're being hard on yourself. If you're someone who constantly criticizes yourself, calling yourself fake might be part of the package. Dealing with low self-esteem is hard, and you should try improving it by recognizing your strengths, capabilities, and uniqueness.
Generally speaking, it actually is relatively normal to have no friends. In fact, a report from 2019 found that about 20% of people have no friends. And in 2021, another report found that 36% of people feel seriously lonely. So, if you don't have friends, you're not alone.
Sometimes, people struggle to make friends because of anxiety or extreme shyness. If this is the case, then you might have a social anxiety disorder preventing you from making social connections.
Explain how you feel, and why you think you should not be friends any longer. Be honest and straightforward but try and remain as nice as possible. Start the conversation by acknowledging that this is difficult. “This is going to be really hard to say, and probably hard to hear.”
Distance yourself from your fake friend.
Instead, hang out with people you know care about you, or work on making new friends. During this time, consider if you want to continue with the friendship moving forward. You don't need to tell your friend that you're distancing yourself from them.
Depersonalization-derealization disorder occurs when you persistently or repeatedly have the feeling that you're observing yourself from outside your body or you have a sense that things around you aren't real, or both.
Imposter syndrome is the condition of feeling anxious and not experiencing success internally, despite being high-performing in external, objective ways. This condition often results in people feeling like "a fraud" or "a phony" and doubting their abilities.
A real friend is someone that you can rely on. You know that they will keep their plans with you. You know that you can rely on them to show up for you when you need it. Real friends are people that have proven they will show up for you in the past and will continue to do so because you are a priority to them.
It's possible a fake friend will change over a long period of time. Fake friends can turn into true friends over time. It's important to take stock of any changes in your relationship. If you feel someone is becoming a better friend, you may be able to continue to have this person in your life.
They follow you in the sun but leave you in the dark.”
True friends are usually those who offer you support, improve your quality of life, promote self-confidence, provide honesty and unconditional love, and help you progress mentally. It often takes time and effort to foster deep, healthy friendships.
They make you feel bad about yourself.
A fake friend is not going to uplift you the way a true friend does. Leeds says that when you're around this person, "you may feel insecure, used, or judged." Sometimes, nothing even has to be explicitly said, but you can undoubtedly feel their judgment or disapproving looks.
They're never around in difficult times
So, being too busy, citing excuses, or flaking out on you every time you need help or support is one of the unmistakable signs your friend doesn't truly care about you.
If your friend doesn't respect your feelings, it's an unhealthy relationship. Feeling anxious or negative in your friendship is a sign that it may be best to end it. Your friend is dishonest or holds back information. “Deep connections require trust,” Schmitt says.
A close friend is honest and speaks from the heart with good intentions. They tell you what you need to hear in a way that you can hear rather than gossip behind your back. A quality friend is trustworthy, not only are your secrets safe with them, but so are your vulnerability, fear, and weirdness.
According to “The Friendship Report,” a global study commissioned by Snapchat in 2019, the average age at which we meet our best friends is 21—a stage when we're not only bonding over formative new experiences such as first love and first heartbreak, but also growing more discerning about whom we befriend.
In general, based on 2021 survey data, the average person in America has between 3 and 5 close friends. According to this survey: almost half (49%) report having 3 or fewer close friends.