In grief, we need the stillness of alone time to feel our feelings and think our thoughts. To slow down and turn inward, we must sometimes actively cultivate solitude. Being alone is not the curse we may have been making it out to be. It is actually a blessing.
When you are grieving it is ok to reflect and be alone. As long as you stay connected with your support team, take that alone time.
Loneliness is a natural part of grief and it is one of the more trying aspects of accepting a loss. When a loved one dies, a hole is left that no one and nothing else can fill. It is as if no one else can know or understand. The intense and mixed feelings of grief can lead to separation and isolation from others.
About 50 years ago, grief expert Elisabeth Kübler-Ross noticed a pattern in the experience of grief and she summarized this pattern as the “five stages of grief,” which are: denial and isolation, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
What is the hardest stage of grief? Depression is usually the longest and most difficult stage of grief. Depression can be a long and difficult stage in the grieving process, but it's also when people feel their deepest sadness.
Isolation is a result of anxiety and depression in that some individuals use it as a self-induced coping mechanism to deal with excessive worry and avoid human interaction.
Although the intensity of your feelings may lessen over time, there is no timetable for how long you will grieve. The length of time is different for each person. For most people their mourning period is a long process and it can take years.
Complicated grief may be considered when the intensity of grief has not decreased in the months after your loved one's death. Some mental health professionals diagnose complicated grief when grieving continues to be intense, persistent and debilitating beyond 12 months.
Can grief cause anxiety? Grief can make us feel like we've lost our sense of safety and control. It's natural to feel anxious or worried about what might happen next or even to worry that we might lose someone else in future. The period before or after someone dies is also very stressful.
Personal space is also important when we are grieving. Sometimes people may push our limits by touching us in uncomfortable ways or may violate our personal space.
Tips for coping with grief and bereavement alone:
Give yourself some alone time to process your emotions. If you have no one to talk to, get in touch with organisations like The Samaritans. Join online and local community groups for support. Learn a new hobby to help stay active and fill time creatively.
Crying is our body's way of getting rid of toxins and our tears act as a release valve for stress, tension, depression and grief.
Unresolved grief, or complex grief, is different from normal grief in various ways. First, it lasts much longer, at times for many years. Second, it's much more severe and intense, not lessening with time but instead often worsening. Third, it interferes with a person's ability to function normally in daily life.
The person living in the shadow often has symptoms that suggest that the pain of grief has been inhibited, delayed, converted or avoided altogether.
Grief or bereavement releases the hormone cortisol in reaction to stress that breaks down tissue and, in excess, can lead to collagen breakdown and accelerated aging. High cortisol levels prompt the skin's sebaceous glands to release more sebum. This in turn results in clogged pores, inflammation, and an increase in p.
Grief can change your personality on a temporary or more permanent basis based on various factors including how profound the loss was, your internal coping skills, your support system, your general temperament, your general stress tolerance, and your outlook on life.
Most people who are dying feel tired. They may want to sleep more often, or for longer periods. They may want to talk less, although some may want to talk more. They may want to eat less or eat different foods since their stomach and digestive system are slowing down.
People react to grief in very different ways. Some people find they cry very frequently and may be overwhelmed by the strength of their emotions. Others may feel numb for some time, or feel unable to cry. Some people experience swings between extremes.
Some of the actual symptoms of PTSD can cause a person to isolate himself/herself. PTSD is characterized by three categories of symptoms: hyperarousal, intrusion and constriction. The way people cope with these symptoms can also contribute to isolation.
In a study of more than 11,000 people published in 2019 in the Journals of Gerontology, scientists found that those who reported high levels of social isolation had above-average decline in cognitive function when it came to tests of memory recall.
Some research suggests that loneliness can increase stress. It's also associated with an increased risk of certain mental health problems. For example, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and sleep problems. My anxiety and depression isolates me from people and stops me from being able to do the things I'd like to do.
Ineffective grieving then, occurs when our emotions run wild; making rational thought difficult. These emotions (such as anger, sadness, fear, insecurity, guilt and/or loneliness) can also cause us to can behave very badly, both with ourselves and with others.
Chronic grief
If you still have very strong emotions around grief for months or years following the initial loss, you may be experiencing chronic grief. This differs from normal grief in that the feelings do not come and go. Nor do they lessen in intensity.