The answer is Dopamine. A drug like chemical that pulsates the body in search of pleasure. The dopamine-driven reward loop triggers a rush of euphoric drug-like highs when chasing a crush and the desire to experience them repeatedly.
It's fairly common to feel emotional or sexual attraction for those who ignore us. Thus, instead of interacting with people who treat you with affection and could become potential partners, most have a tendency to idealize those who reject them. Psychologically, this effect is known as “reactance”.
Chasing someone is a thrill… one that you probably don't get to revel in when you're in a secure relationship. Scientifically, having a crush and falling for someone releases feel-good hormones like dopamine and adrenaline. Part of the chase is a chase for those brain chemicals, to feel those euphoric feelings again.
You keep falling in love with people who don't love you back because you are afraid to receive love. You're fearful of receiving love because some part of you believes you're undeserving. Some part of you thinks life must be hard. You're avoiding the self-work that you need to do.
Why We Always Chase the Wrong Person | Matthew Hussey
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Why do we want the ones who don't want us?
So why can't we let go of people who continually reject us? According to Helen Fisher and her colleagues, the reason romantic rejection gets us hooked is that this sort of rejection stimulates parts of the brain associated with motivation, reward, addiction, and cravings.
Romantic rejection can lead to increased yearning because it stimulates parts of the brain associated with motivation, reward, addiction, and cravings. New research also suggests the reasoning individuals fall for the unavailable may actually be scientific, some people cant help it.
When you chase people, you're handing the keys to your happiness over to them. You're only going to be happy when they notice you, answer your calls or are nice to you. And deep down you know that these things aren't going to happen often enough.
Stop chasing someone who has made it clear they're not ready. Stop chasing someone who is full of excuses. Stop giving your time and energy to someone who has made it clear either with their words, their actions or lack thereof that they are not ready or they simply are not eager to be there fully for you.
How do you set a boundary with someone who ignores you?
Clearly express when you feel overwhelmed, ignored, or unheard. If you're afraid to say “no,” start saying “I'll get back to you” and think about things before you provide an answer. Let your friends know that you have personal goals and dreams you are working towards.
Ignoring is powerful because you take what they desire, away. Lowkey, this ends up turning into a form of revenge without you even trying to do so. To take it another further, invest in yourself.
Relationships can be difficult at times and it's not uncommon for couples to find themselves losing romantic feelings and facing the decision of whether to remain together or separate. It is normal for relationships to change over time, and that sometimes includes losing feelings for the person you are with.
Why do I want to be with someone who doesn t want to be with me?
The answer is Dopamine. A drug like chemical that pulsates the body in search of pleasure. The dopamine-driven reward loop triggers a rush of euphoric drug-like highs when chasing a crush and the desire to experience them repeatedly.
According to Hani Henry, chair and associate professor of psychology in the Department of Sociology, Anthropology, Psychology and Egyptology at AUC, Robert Sternberg's psychological theory covers the most common reasons why we fall in love, namely: intimacy, passion and commitment.
What is it called when you want someone you can't have?
Unrequited love may take a few different forms, including: Loving someone who does not return those feelings. Pining for someone who is not available. Mutual attraction between people who are both in other relationships.
