The silent treatment, even if it's brief, activates the anterior cingulate cortex – the part of the brain that detects physical pain. The initial pain is the same, regardless of whether the exclusion is by strangers, close friends or enemies.
Being left in silence can be extremely painful, as it involves the loss of connection, love, intimacy, and sometimes even family participation.
Clearly, silent treatment creates an atmosphere of anxiety, fear, and sadness that preclude an underlying sense of safety. As such, it causes unhappiness and psychological harm that most often heightens conflict in a relationship. It can lead one to feel anger, abandonment, rejection, and overall distress.
In general, the silent treatment is a manipulation tactic that can leave important issues in a relationship unresolved. It also can leave the partner on the receiving end feeling worthless, unloved, hurt, confused, frustrated, angry, and unimportant.
Silence speaks volumes when they don't recognize, acknowledge, or refuse to understand. It's the loudest sound there is when words do not adequately express thoughts to deaf ears. It speaks through the hurt when it's too painful to talk. It lets them know they've hurt you, not even sure if they are aware or even care.
Silence intensifies the impact of trauma, and trauma that goes unspoken, un-witnessed, and unclaimed too often "outs itself" as more violence to self or others.
The silent treatment, or stonewalling, is a passive-aggressive form of manipulation and can be considered emotional abuse.
The silent treatment might be employed by passive personality types to avoid conflict and confrontation, while strong personality types use it to punish or control. Some people may not even consciously choose it at all.
Using the silent treatment is an unproductive way of communicating within a relationship. It can sometimes be a form of self-protection, but at other times, it indicates emotional abuse. People who regularly use or experience the silent treatment should take steps to address it.
If someone displays unmanageable emotions and easily flies off the handle, this is a serious red flag. Responding with uncontrollable rage or the "silent treatment" could point to abusive (physical or emotional) behavior in the future, says Trombetti.
Research has found that people who received the silent treatment experienced a threat to their needs of belonging, self-esteem, control, and meaningful existence. This type of behavior reinforces the feeling that someone we care about wants nothing to do with us. It can feel as though you don't exist.
Narcissistic silent treatment is a type of narcissistic manipulation and narcissistic abuse. Narcissists may use the silent treatment to communicate they are unhappy with you, to control you, or as a form of punishment.
Being ignored is especially difficult for a person who is isolated by abuse and coercive control, and depends on the abuser's approval to feel worthwhile and safe. Many abuse survivors say they hated the silent treatment more than the insults or yelling.
Quiet people are more likely to be introverts than extroverts and tend to be more creative and sensitive than the average person. They also tend to be private people who don't like being in large crowds or socializing much at all unless it's necessary for work or school.
Silence is scary not just because it's unfamiliar, but also because it opens the door to a whole bunch of thoughts, sensations, and emotions that noise keeps at bay. As Steven puts it, silence can be like “getting locked in a room with your harshest critic.”
A destructive silence is one that reduces trust, impairs communication, and has the potential to cause harm in a relationship or network of relationships.
By establishing boundaries, enforcing consequences if necessary, sharing emotions with others, and speaking up for yourself; you will take away their power, thus protecting yourself from the narcissist's silent treatment.
We either grow up with parents that yell at the top of their lunges or parents that refuse to address disagreements at all. Neither provides a good foundation for handling conflict in a healthy relationship. The bottom line is the silent treatment is not a healthy coping technique for you or your partner.
A narcissist's silent treatment can last hours, days, weeks, or even months. If you are experiencing the silent treatment, it is very important that you don't give in to their manipulation and prepare yourself for the powerful manipulation tactics that they will use to end the silent treatment.
Silent treatment can be an immature way of dealing with situations and its practice should not be made a habit of. Imagine you have upset your loved one for some reason and they are angry with you.
When you give someone the silent treatment, you are showing them that they are insignificant, unworthy and unlovable. It can greatly deplete their self-esteem, leaving serious consequences. It can cause physical issues as well.
They are afraid of vulnerability. Manipulators seldom express their needs, desires, or true feelings.
Held, that silence in the face of pertinent and direct accusation of crime par- takes of the nature of a confession, and is admissible as a circumstance to be considered by the jury as tending to show guilt, even though the person accused is in custody on the charge.
Silence can be a powerful weapon against narcissists. Narcissists thrive on attention and control, but when they are met with silence, they are stripped of their power.