“You may also find yourself reminiscing about your relationship and going over the breakup.” Going “no contact” allows you more time to healthily process the loss and grief of your relationship. Ultimately, it can help you mend your heart, accept that the relationship is over, and begin dating again once you're ready.
Going No Contact “can help you properly acknowledge a loss and mourn it, and eventually create space for something new,” Wade adds. Think of the No Contact Rule as a way to truly experience and transform your grief, rather than distract and soothe by reaching out for post-breakup dopamine hits from your ex.
The no contact rule helps you deal with the feelings of abandonment that come after a breakup because it gives you time to deal with those feelings instead of being overwhelmed by them during interactions with your ex.
Staying silent can also help you feel empowered. You're taking charge and showing your ex that you're capable of and willing to live life without them. Whether you're the one who was hurt or the one who ended it, cutting off communication after a breakup puts you in control.
The “no contact rule” is so effective because it means a person has accepted the fact the relationship is over. Putting away mementos, blocking phone numbers, email addresses, and unfriending an ex on social media are catharsis actions.
Roughly 4 weeks of time alone should be enough to get back into the normal rhythm of the single life. It might feel messy and strange at first, but after 30 days you may find yourself feeling much better. While 30 days is a good rule of thumb, everybody is different.
The psychology of no contact on dumper is a coping mechanism to help you think hard about what went wrong and how you could be a better person and a potentially better partner to the next person who will come along. Instead of thinking about your ex, you have to focus on self-improvement and healing.
Silence speaks volumes
The best revenge is no reaction. Believe it, the silence and zero reaction really bothers your ex, and they consider it as the best served revenge. Nothing creates more curiosity than silence. Your ex would expect a vent or an angry rant from you, but don't give in.
Yep. They sure do! Sometimes after the time alone the dumper starts to miss said ex. Sure maybe at the time when you two had broken up, the dumper initially feels relieved and care free, but over time the dumper starts realizing what they no longer have and that nobody can replace it.
Silence can yield more power than words. Inventor and artist Leonardo da Vinci said, “Nothing strengthens authority so much as silence.” Leaders know how to use silence as a tactic for speaking up for themselves and as an opportunity to lead.
The no-contact rule refers to cutting off all contact with an ex following a breakup, and it's the best method for moving on from an ex. No contact should last for a minimum of 60 days, and it includes no texting, no calling, and no interacting on social media.
It's unlikely that an ex will forget about you, even if you don't communicate with them after the breakup. Relationships tend to make an large emotional impact on both people involved, so it's likely your ex will remember you and the relationship even after the breakup.
Three-Month Rule: After a Break-Up
Basically, after a break-up, the three-month rule is a rule that says you and your ex are both given 3 months before entering the dating scene again. Just waiting it out, and mourning that your relationship ended. Just go on with your individual separate lives and see what happens.
In most cases, if you give your ex enough space, they will at some point miss you. Of course, that doesn't necessarily mean they're going to get on their hands and knees and beg for you back. For some the “missing emotion” can be fleeting. For others, all consuming.
Going 'no-contact' with someone you spent a lot of time with and planned a future with can be painful. A woman experiencing the stages of no contact is likely to feel angry, sad, and lonely. While a woman is likely to feel sadness in the early stages of no contact, she will quickly get over her ex as time goes on.
It goes the opposite way for them. The dumpee is sad and gradually becomes better. The dumper is happy and gradually becomes sadder and sadder. Of course, depending on whether you stayed no contact or not.
If you average all the reputable research on the ex recovery process and chances of getting your ex back, there's about a 43.5% chance your ex will come back without doing anything.
Silence can be a very powerful way to “be” with another person, especially when they are troubled. It can communicate acceptance of the other person as they are as of a given moment, and particularly when they have strong feelings like sorrow, fear or anger.
Takeaway. After a breakup, the best form of revenge can be putting your energy into creating the life you want to live. You might do this by taking a break from social media, finding a new hobby, spending time with loved ones, focusing on your career, and volunteering.
Men may not miss you for some days after the breakup. But that is just an initial phase. After things start to settle down, the male mind, during the no-contact phase, starts to look for your presence in his life. He slowly starts to miss you and your presence in his life.
Cutting off contact with the Dumper often triggers a “reaction,” because it means that the Dumpee takes back their power. They are signaling that they don't want to be dependent anymore. Some Dumpers don't like that and will make an attempt to get their power over them back.
He might only think about himself.
He probably won't be wondering what you're feeling—instead, he'll only be thinking about how it's your loss or how to move on to the next girlfriend. Unfortunately, going “no contact” doesn't inspire a change of heart in every guy.