Many Nines are introverts, in truth. They need to be, to keep themselves insulated from a world where chaos is ever present. Even when they're social and active, a part of them are kept in reserve. They are likeable, steady, tolerant and optimistic, but don't ask a Nine about their real feelings.
Each type on the Enneagram has a certain lean towards being more introverted or extroverted, and the Nine is no exception. A Nine's propensity for merging with the people around them often requires a Nine to be alone to know what they think and feel apart from others.
Most people familiar with the Enneagram will say that either Introversion or Extraversion can exist in all nine of the types, but Type 5s are viewed as the classic Introvert and Type 7s are seen as the classic Extravert.
Enneagram Type 9 is called The Peacemaker. They are motivated by the need to keep the peace, connect with others, and avoid conflict. Generally, type nines are kind, gentle, reassuring, supportive, loyal, and nonjudgmental in relationships.
As part of the Body/Instinctive triad in the Enneagram, Type 9s have a sensitive issue around anger. They subconsciously deny and under-express it, and it often comes as a surprise to Type 9s that they have unprocessed anger. They often don't recognize this.
While Nines will go out of their way to accommodate others and downplay their own needs, setting themselves up to be overlooked, Nines dislike being ignored. Many Enneagram Nines are unaware of their own passive aggressive behaviour patterns and how these affect others around them.
Deepest Fear: Nines fear being too needy and thus pushing people away. They cope with this fear by submitting to the desires and agendas of the people around them: being agreeable in order to be included.
Many Nines are introverts, in truth. They need to be, to keep themselves insulated from a world where chaos is ever present. Even when they're social and active, a part of them are kept in reserve. They are likeable, steady, tolerant and optimistic, but don't ask a Nine about their real feelings.
However, when complacent Nines are under stress (also known as their “direction of disintegration”), they act more like an anxious and worried Enneagram type Six. This is a Nine no longer self-possessed, but fraught with anxiety and insecurity.
First, it can be hard for them to get a partner. Type 9s tend to be wallflowers, and potential romantic prospects may be drawn to flashier, more gregarious types initially. However, once people get to know Type 9s, they're attracted to their calm, caring personalities.
Type Five: They are socially awkward
Contrary to this common misconception, Fives' constant introspection makes them funny and interesting to talk to. When around their friends, they open up and can even be the liveliest ones there. Fives isolate themselves because they recharge with alone time.
Fives are the least emotional type in general, experiencing low levels of each of the emotions. While Fives disconnect from feelings, they are actually more adept at avoiding situations where they know they would experience fear, or other strong emotions.
Sixes are one of the most anxiety-prone types of the Enneagram and tend to overreact when under stress. Identifying what triggers an overreaction as well as finding space to process their thoughts in the aftermath of a crisis is crucial for their mental health and general well-being.
Type Fives don't pair as well with Nines
Both types tend to go into their imaginary worlds to stay safe, making it difficult for them to connect.
(When Nines are highly intelligent, they can be as brilliant as Fives, although their intellectual prowess is compartmentalized. They are brilliant at work but unfocused and inattentive everywhere else, whereas Fives are focused and attentive everywhere all the time.)
Type Nines commonly pair well with Ones, Twos.
Nines can become too comfortable, leading to stubbornness and an unwillingness to assert themselves. In a Nine-One partnership, Ones hugely benefit from the easygoing nature of the Nine.
Level 9: They finally become severely disoriented and catatonic, abandoning themselves, turning into shattered shells. Multiple personalities possible. Generally corresponds to the Schizoid and Dependent personality disorders.
The most basic desire of the Enneagram Type 9 is to have internal peace. Nines strive to be in harmony with themselves and the world around them. Peacekeepers defend themselves by ignoring pain or numbing their internal conflicts through food, television, and other repetitive patterns.
The Enneagram Nine Child – The Rejection of Their Voice
In a family where there was frequent conflict or turmoil, they learned to “tune out” the problems and try to numb themselves to the conflict inside.
Enneagram 9s in Grief and Loss
Since 9s are in the gut/body triad, anger is more likely to flare up especially if there is any sense of not being heard or conflict involved. They may easily dip into the negative type 9 traits such as being indecisive, passive aggressive, and forgetful.
Type 9, Peacemaker
Numb, drained, disconnected and checked out of life, they take on a zombie-like appearance, barely showing up as a functioning human being. They may fall into a depression. The dark side of Type 9s are usually sins of omission or apathy.
Negative Traits of Type 9
Conflict avoidant, indecisive, unassertive, passive-aggressive, stubborn, insecure, forgetful.
Beneath their peaceful facades, Nines actually have a reservoir of anger and rage they hide from themselves and others. This resentment stems from their Core Fear of being overlooked, disconnected, unstable, and at the mercy of others' needs and preferences.
In Stress: Nines take on qualities of Sixes, becoming overcommitted, worried, rigid, and anxious. They may doubt themselves which makes decision-making even harder, and can become uncharacteristically reactive.
They become passive-aggressive.
Passive-aggressive behavior and “negative implementation” are classic tools Type 9s use to stand their ground and yet still avoid conflict. They may agree to do something they never intend to do.