A narcissist usually grows up as a loner. He/she has no friends and even if they do, most of them are superficial, merely acquaintances. Our friendships teach us a lot about building and maintaining relationships.
Many narcissists prefer being alone because they can focus on themselves without having to consider anyone else's needs. They can focus on whatever is most important to them. Cerebral narcissists, in particular, value intellect above anything else, and they look down on people who don't seem as brilliant.
Vulnerable narcissists try to defend themselves through Isolation and avoidance of social relations as they feel afraid of being let down and ashamed of needing others (Bernardi & Eidlin, 2018).
Narcissist couples in relationships
You would expect a narcissist to stay single or in casual relationships, to be able to pursue their career or talents. But, they do enjoy having someone near too. They usually shape (often through abuse) their partner into what they need to get that constant admiration and care.
The narcissist goes into a schizoid mode: he isolates himself, a hermit in the kingdom of his hurt. He minimises his social interactions and uses "messengers" to communicate with the outside. Devoid of energy, the narcissist can no longer pretend to succumb to social conventions.
In order to deal with the problem, it's important to be able to recognize the signs of being married to a narcissist. One of the first things a narcissist does it isolate you from family and friends. They want you to be completely dependent on them and eliminate any support system you have in place.
Narcissists can feel emotional pain, but not usually in the same way as others. The emotional pain they may feel is usually related to underlying selfish needs. Underneath the displays of superiority and sense of entitlement, they often feel empty, powerless, and shameful, which they perceive as weakness.
A partner with narcissistic traits is more likely to play games, act in manipulative ways, and exploit you for their benefit. If a person you're dating exhibits these traits, it doesn't necessarily mean the relationship is doomed.
Narcissists can love, but this superficial and momentary affection serves as a way to get what they want from others. While their role as caring partners, parents, or friends may appear genuine, a lack of empathy and devotion to themselves renders narcissists unable to develop meaningful relationships.
Put Your Needs First. Narcissists make others feel guilty about being happy because they expect everyone to put the narcissist's happiness first. If you're not constantly praising them or accepting their criticisms that make them feel superior, they won't be satisfied.
Receiving Constant Attention, Compliments, & Praise
Narcissists rely on praise and admiration to gain a sense of emotional stability that they did not receive in the past. Accumulating these compliments not only satisfies this but also fuels their grandiosity and ego.
According to the Mayo Clinic “Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance and a deep need for admiration. Those with narcissistic personality disorder believe that they're superior to others and have little regard for other people's feelings.
The narcissist will only enter into a friendship if it will benefit them in some way. Most people will see they are being used by the narcissist and will end the friendship. The narcissist may make friends easily, but they lack lifelong friends.
They have a lot of friends, they tend to date more,” said W. Keith Campbell, professor of psychology at the University of Georgia. “It's not that there are more out there. But people who are narcissistic are extroverted and have big social networks.
Narcissists hate to be alone. They need external validation for their existence. At all times they have to latch on to someone, whether it be a friend, a colleague, or a romantic partner. Narcissists need someone to bounce their lies off of.
They can show great interest in romantic prospects and seduce with generosity, expressions of love, flattery, sex, romance, and promises of commitment. Amorous narcissists (Don Juan and Mata Hari types) are adept and persuasive lovers and may have many conquests, yet remain single.
Sexual narcissists typically demonstrate a lack of empathy for their partner's needs in an effort to serve their own intimacy needs. They may do so while engaging in aggressive behavior, or more generally by ignoring their partner's requests or preferences in order to prioritize their own.
“To what extent do you agree with this statement: 'I am a narcissist.'”
Low self-worth/confidence/esteem is at the core of a narcissism. This low sense of self naturally makes it extremely easy for them to become jealous – very jealous. And not just about anyone potentially interested in you romantically, but anyone or anything that can take the focus off of them.
Narcissists are highly sensitive to criticism or any perceived threat to their self-image, and they will go to great lengths to protect it. If you criticize them or challenge their dominance, you will trigger a defensive response.
It is common for people with a narcissistic personality disorder to regret discarding or losing someone, but it does not mean what you might think. If they feel regret, it is not because they hurt you. It is for losing something that they value. You are a possession, not a real person.
Rumour has it that SSRI's (such as Fluoxetine, known as Prozac) might have adverse effects if the primary disorder is NPD. They sometimes lead to the Serotonin syndrome, which includes agitation and exacerbates the rage attacks typical of a narcissist.
On the other extreme, persons with vulnerable narcissism may present with salient features of dysthymia, depression, and anhedonia. However, the grandiosity and need for admiration would be prominent despite the affective symptoms, which would differentiate it from a major depressive disorder.
Warning Signs Of An Aging Narcissist
Become more reclusive and only want to spend time with people they feel are worthy of their attention. May lose interest in the people around them altogether. May find that they are no longer able to tolerate the imperfections of others and may lash out in anger or frustration.