If you find yourself dating someone who has anxiety, it's understandable that you might have some concerns. Watching someone experience anxiety can be upsetting, and can even make you anxious or uneasy, whether or not you are prone to anxiety yourself. You might also have concerns about the future of your relationship.
Dating someone with anxiety can feel very overwhelming and stressful, especially once your partner's behavior shifts. They may start to shut down, pull away, and behave in a passive-aggressive manner, or they may become more controlling, angry, or overly critical.
Just like walking into a party and suddenly feeling like you're in a “social mood” when you hadn't been moments before, fear and anxiety are two emotions that spread easily from one person to another.
Some people experience anxiety because their partner is "too" something - too rich, too good-looking, too busy, too talkative, etc. The partner (boyfriend, husband, girlfriend, wife) has qualities that lead to anxiety.
There are many reasons why someone might feel anxious about their relationships. They might fear being abandoned or rejected or worry that their feelings are not reciprocated. Some may worry that their partner will be unfaithful or that the relationship will not last.
If you find your anxiety getting worse when you spend too much time with your partner or go an entire day without hearing from them, you might have a boundaries issue. Creating set expectations for things like time apart and how often you check in with each other can alleviate some of your more anxious times.
“Having candid talks together on what they are feeling and validating those feelings is paramount,” said therapist Daryl Cioffi. To show your partner you accept their anxiety, you need to encourage them to open up about it. Try to listen without judging, becoming defensive or taking their anxiety personally.
Many individuals with anxiety disorders have an intense desire for closeness to their romantic partners depending on them regularly for support and reassurance, which often leads to overdependence and co-dependent behaviors.
The spouse or partner may become the sole breadwinner at times — often a stressful role and one the partner may not wish to have. Social life — People with anxiety disorders often avoid routine social activities. Unfortunately, the partner's social life can suffer as well, making both feel isolated.
Anxiety disorders are the most common of mental disorders and affect nearly 30% of adults at some point in their lives. But anxiety disorders are treatable and a number of effective treatments are available. Treatment helps most people lead normal productive lives.
Anxiety breaks down trust and connection …
It can also make you less attuned to the needs of your partner. If you're worried about what could be happening, it's difficult to pay attention to what is happening. When you feel overwhelmed, your partner may feel as though you aren't present.
Instead, high-functioning anxiety typically refers to someone who experiences anxiety while still managing daily life quite well. Generally, a person with high-functioning anxiety may appear put together and well- accomplished on the outside, yet experience worry, stress or have obsessive thoughts on the inside.
Difficult experiences in childhood, adolescence or adulthood are a common trigger for anxiety problems. Going through stress and trauma when you're very young is likely to have a particularly big impact. Experiences which can trigger anxiety problems include things like: physical or emotional abuse.
It can be hard to relate to these concerns, and as a result, many people don't know how to best help someone with anxiety. “People are often dismissive of people experiencing anxiety,” says Joseph McGuire, Ph. D., a pediatric psychologist with Johns Hopkins Medicine.