Spending time apart can make your relationship a whole lot healthier, Erickson says, because it gives you both a chance to reconnect with your own values, desires. It'll be easier to connect in a genuine way after you've had some space, as well as a lot more exciting.
In short: yes — as long as both people in the relationship want it to. “Space can heal a relationship,” explains Jason Polk, a licensed clinical social worker and couples therapist in Denver, Colorado, “especially if the couple is currently toxic or verbally abusive to each other.”
Why Space is Essential. Every healthy relationship needs space from time to time. Giving ourselves space that is separate from our relationship allows us to still maintain individuality. Having physical space or uninterrupted time to ourselves allows us to pay closer attention to our emotions.
According to U.S. statistics, 87 percent of couples who legally separate eventually get a divorce, while only 13 percent choose to come back together.
"Space in a relationship is normal," Jonathan Bennett, relationship and dating expert at Double Trust Dating, tells Bustle. If you need an evening alone, or want to go on a trip all by your lonesome, it certainly doesn't mean your relationship is falling apart.
Statistical research shows that the average length of separation before reconciliation is six to eight months. Thus, it is a safe period when the spouses can cool off and decide whether they want to give their marriage another chance or get a divorce.
The average separation length before reconciliation is six to eight months, as per statistical research. This time is considered safe as it helps one get their emotions in check before getting back with their spouse. Does time apart strengthen a relationship?
A recent study concluded that while the vast majority of married couples who separate will eventually divorce (within three years), approximately 15% remain separated indefinitely, even past the 10-year mark.
Regardless of the nature of your question, know that ex-couples getting back together after a breakup are more common. Some couples may get back after a few weeks or months, while others go apart only to find a way to be together after years of living separately.
It's long been taught by the book of love, but now scientists suggest that absence truly does make the heart grow fonder, particularly when it comes to intimacy.
Coan advises every couple to adhere to the 70/30 rule: For the happiest, most harmonious relationship, the pro suggests spending 70% of time together, and 30% apart. That gives each of you enough freedom to explore your own interests while still being rooted and invested in your relationship.
Spending time apart can make your relationship a whole lot healthier, Erickson says, because it gives you both a chance to reconnect with your own values, desires. It'll be easier to connect in a genuine way after you've had some space, as well as a lot more exciting.
In most cases, you'll need to give them several days or possibly weeks of space, depending on what happened. During this time, don't call or text them more than you agreed. If you do, they'll feel like you aren't respecting their wishes and may become more upset. If you can, ask them what they'd prefer.
It's completely possible to reconcile after a separation. Depending on your relationship and the reasons you separated, there's still a chance you can work things out and get your marriage back on track.
A temporary separation is an effective way to work through relationship problems, experience single life, and help you and your partner decide if divorce is in your future. Although a temporary separation is an informal, personal process, you should consult an experienced divorce lawyer before agreeing to its terms.
Occasionally and against the odds, some couples are able to reconcile after a period of separation. Statistics based on couples getting back together after a separation show that while 87% of couples finally end their relationship in divorce after a separation, the remaining 13% are able to reconcile post-separation.
A separation can strengthen a marriage if it's done for the right reasons and if there are clear agreements from the start. Elements of a successful separation that enhances a relationship include getting third-party support and maintaining regular communication.
A trial separation can give you and your partner a chance to respect one another's view of your problems—even if you feel that they're wrong or shouldn't feel the way they do. One thing is almost certain. If you and your partner are not willing to compromise, then the relationship isn't likely to improve.
'" As a rough rule, two months should be a safe amount of time to broach the subject. But every relationship is different, so if it feels right earlier, go for it. If it doesn't feel right at that stage, there are a few steps you can take to build yourself up for the conversation.
"If you are just dating casually, on the verge of a making a commitment, and 'space' means being away with no contact for undetermined periods of days/weeks, and this is something you do not enjoy, then it is a sign to re-evaluate why you are dating in the first place," Kermit says.
Set a reasonable time frame
Six months is a break up, not a break, the experts say. Anything from one week to a month should be enough time for one or both parties to determine whether they should stay together.