Regrets for things that you've done or things that you wish you had tried? If so, you are in good company. Many adults with ADHD carry around feelings of sadness, remorse or disappointment over something that happened in their lives or something that they did.
In fact, many people with ADHD are very sensitive to the feelings of others. Executive function challenges may cause people to do things that make them feel remorse. These challenges can include: Trouble connecting the “right now” to the future.
ADHD and empathy doesn't have to be a relationship killer. As we've discussed, unfortunately, many people with ADHD tend to have a lack of empathy. This can be addressed, though, through identifying and communicating about each other's feelings.
Shame with ADHD is a very common experience, but there are ways to address it and to start feeling better about yourself. Having ADHD means that you may struggle to do things that come easier to others, but this isn't something that you should be ashamed of.
For people with ADHD, shame arises from the repeated failure to meet expectations from parents, teachers, friends, bosses, and the world.
About 40 percent of individuals with ADHD have oppositional defiant disorder (ODD). ODD involves a pattern of arguing; losing one's temper; refusing to follow rules; blaming others; deliberately annoying others; and being angry, resentful, spiteful and vindictive.
The ADHD brain is particularly vulnerable to this spiral. For many, it's because even a minor mistake can trigger rejection sensitivity bringing along with it a wall of shame, hopelessness, and depression. As if that wasn't bad enough, all these bad feelings-, they then, tank our productivity.
Looking for stimulation
It's often said that people with ADHD enjoy drama. And scientifically that makes sense. Negative emotions cause a release of adrenaline that stimulates the brain. Which means people with ADHD may subconsciously start a row or chase relationship drama.
Also, ADHD can lead to depression when people have a hard time with their symptoms. Children may have trouble getting along in school or with playmates, or adults may have issues at work. That can lead to deep feelings of hopelessness and other signs of depression.
In some cases, they may be too honest for some societal standards. But there may be certain situations that increase the chance of people with ADHD lying out of habit or as a coping mechanism to avoid unwanted consequences related to their ADHD symptoms.
Studies suggest that ADHD-driven emotional sensitivity in people makes them struggle to cope with rejection. This rejection may be as simple as having a friend say no to you or as big as not being accepted for a job you applied for.
At a glance
ADHD can sometimes affect how teens experience love. Trouble managing emotions can make feelings more intense. There are ways you can help your teen handle the ups and downs of being in love.
Can someone with ADHD fall in love? While all kinds of people can fall in love, the experience of people with ADHD falling in love can be more intense for them. This is because the person with ADHD can hyperfocus on the person they are in love with.
On the podcast, we discuss that even though ADHD people tend to be more forgiving, there isn't hard science as to why that is.
We tend to react self-defensively, or worse, angrily. Rejection sensitivity is extremely common in people with ADHD. We get overly excited about things, including good things. Just as we often overreact to minor problems and annoyances, we can also go overboard in the other direction.
It's all about the natural extremes of ADHD brains. They are both extra good at forgiving (or maybe it's actually forgetting) but can also have an exceptionally difficult time of it as well.
Similarly, people with ADHD can also experience 'meltdowns' more commonly than others, which is where emotions build up so extremely that someone acts out, often crying, angering, laughing, yelling and moving all at once, driven by many different emotions at once – this essentially resembles a child tantrum and can ...
Emotional detachment can be frustrating to deal with, especially if you have ADHD, as you may have difficulty self-regulating your emotions.
People with ADHD are exquisitely sensitive to rejection and criticism. They can experience hopelessness and demoralization because they try to succeed by imitating the paths to success of people without ADHD, and then fail over and over again because the same paths don't work for them.
Individuals with ADHD often have a pattern of chronic underachievement that can lead to insecurity and depression, says Hallowell. "They feel shame and frustration. Without the diagnosis, they can't make use of their talent," he says.
Yet, some individuals with ADHD do habitually bait others into heated disagreements. It's typically a subconscious behavior. Some, though, will admit to “loving a good argument.” On some level, they've learned on some level that stimulation or adrenaline or… something…
If you have ADHD, you may blurt things out without thinking, which can cause hurt feelings. This impulsivity can also lead to irresponsible and even reckless behavior (for example, making a big purchase that isn't in the budget, leading to fights over finances). Emotional outbursts.
A lack of self-acceptance. Prohibitively expensive medications. Here, commiserate with fellow ADDitude readers as they share some of their biggest challenges of managing life with ADHD or ADD. > Creating rituals to keep track of things.
ADHD is mentally, emotionally, and physically draining. And chances are you don't make recuperation a top priority — few of us do. Which is a problem, because no one else is going to make your health a priority unless you do. Get started today with these essential self-preservation strategies.
Being Forgetful Every Time
According to the American Psychiatric Association, one of the common ADHD struggles a person can experience involves being forgetful. A person with ADHD might find it hard to remember things just said a few minutes ago or follow instructions.