Phone calls involve a lot of small talk. Small talk is incredibly annoying to introverts. Since most introverts prefer deep conversation over shallow small talk, the socially acceptable small talk in phone calls can feel tedious and unnecessary to them. Think about your average phone call.
Most people avoid talking on the phone due to social anxiety. Social anxiety may be exacerbated due to the uncertainty and ambiguity of telephone conversations.
There are many different reasons why people hate talking on the phone. According to various studies, those reasons include concern about sounding weird to the caller, being misunderstood, fear of being unable to satisfy the caller's need, or the caller not thinking highly of them.
On a call, there are no external distractions, so it can feel like the spotlight is on us to answer questions straight away. Pauses can feel extremely uncomfortable too. In person, you can see when someone is distracted or thinking but on the phone brief silences can feel awkward.
Think about what he or she is going to say
Just picking up the phone and dialing would lead to disaster! To avoid awkward silences and stuttering, the introvert must spend time, much more time than the actual length of the envisioned phone call, to decide what he or she is going to say.
Phone calls involve a lot of small talk.
Small talk is incredibly annoying to introverts. Since most introverts prefer deep conversation over shallow small talk, the socially acceptable small talk in phone calls can feel tedious and unnecessary to them. Think about your average phone call.
For the introvert, who has limited social energy, this can be utterly exhausting. Another reason phone conversations can be such a drain is that they cut off my use of nonverbal cues and force me to rely only on my verbal abilities — which, for many of us introverts, is not our strength under pressure.
Many people diagnosed with attention deficit disorder (ADHD or ADD) feel the same way about the phone. I often say (jokingly) that not listening to voicemail should be one of the diagnostic criteria of ADD. Let's break down your phone challenges into skill factors and anxiety factors.
Recognised as an offshoot of social anxiety disorder, telephobia afflicts people across countries and generations. Those who suffer from telephobia might be comfortable delivering a talk in a room full of strangers or might send dozens of text messages a day, but get shivers when they need to talk on the phone.
It's less time-consuming - A text message is less demanding than a phone call because the recipient can choose to respond when it's convenient for them. When people receive texts, they have more time to think before they respond and are less likely to feel rushed or pressured.
Millennials may also avoid phone calls because of: The inability to think of what to say ahead of time, like they can with texting. The inconvenience of having their day interrupted by annoying or boring conversations. The fact that phone calls can be less straightforward than sending one concise message.
Hating the phone doesn't necessarily mean you have social anxiety — the two often go hand in hand, but some people who are otherwise perfectly fine with social interactions have a deep-seated fear of making or receiving a call. And besides, you're in good company.
An introvert, on the other hand, wakes up with a 100 percent social battery. Talking to people drains them. To recharge, they need to spend time alone with their thoughts. That's why introverts generally avoid small talk even if they do love engaging in conversations.
Telephone phobia (telephonophobia, telephobia, phone phobia) is reluctance or fear of making or taking phone calls, literally, "fear of telephones".
A person with social anxiety disorder feels symptoms of anxiety or fear in situations where they may be scrutinized, evaluated, or judged by others, such as speaking in public, meeting new people, dating, being on a job interview, answering a question in class, or having to talk to a cashier in a store.
Why Are Some People Shy? Shyness is partly a result of genes a person has inherited. It's also influenced by behaviors they've learned, the ways people have reacted to their shyness, and life experiences they've had.
If you're self-conscious about your voice or ability to communicate your thoughts, not being able to read the other person's body language could make you feel uncomfortable or inhibited. Natural lulls in the conversation might make you worry your conversation partner is silently judging everything you say.
Before making and receiving calls, put a smile on your face. This may sound silly, but it helps you to relax and conveys a sense of pleasantness to the person you're speaking with. Reward yourself. After making difficult calls, reward yourself by spending some time doing something that you enjoy.
Communication can be tricky for people with ADHD, who may interrupt too much, speak too quickly, or space out unintentionally and miss key elements of a conversation.
Be on the lookout for nonverbal clues.
These include body language, such as moving away from you, cutting conversations short, or crossing their arms or legs. Also note facial expressions, such as red faces, scowls, tight lips, or hurt or angry eyes.
Many people with ADHD might find it hard to easily read and assess others' emotions when they are just looking at a piece of text on the screen. Likewise, many of us might not be aware that the tone of our message might come off as harsh.
The quality of their communications is sound, but the quantity is lower than needed. When introverts communicate, it's typically effective, but they usually don't communicate often enough. Most introverts also are strong listeners, too. If you're an “innie” leader, most likely you need to communicate more.
Introvert tend to be happy spending time on their own and are often energised by doing so. Introverts often find the 'noise' of random conversations (especially when there are several going on at once) draining of their energy. So they'll often avoid the very conversations you want them to engage in!
Silence gives introverts space to process their thoughts and soak in their surroundings, among other benefits.