Yes, narcissists love to cuddle, but it's always about them. They enjoy being showered with love because it boosts their ego. Receiving affection from their partner makes narcissists feel that they are perfect in every way. It also makes them feel good about their physical appearance.
Narcissists may show you love and act in loving ways, but this tends to be conditional, in that displays of love depend on what you can give them in return. For people with NPD, relationships tend to be transactional. Love is not self-serving, proud, boastful, exploitative, or envious.
Somatic narcissists love when you cuddle them. They want you to lavish them with affection, to show them that their body is the greatest gift in the world! However, don't expect much in return- again, they're so focused on how others perceive their bodies that they won't pay nearly as much attention to you.
If a narcissist is interested in you, you might notice that they shower you with admiration and attention shortly after you meet them. They might be quick to say “I love you,” put you on a pedestal, and make grand romantic gestures.
Some of the most popular ways narcissists use withholding include stonewalling (the shutting down of conversations before they've even begun), the silent treatment, a sudden withdrawal of affection and physical intimacy without reason, and unexplained disappearances where they refuse to contact you or engage with you ...
Signs a Narcissist Loves You
They will treat you with respect. They will listen to your feelings. They will respect your boundaries. They will take responsibility for their actions.
Lack of Empathy
According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, narcissists lack empathy. They're “unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others.” (APA, 2013) Research shows that they have structural abnormalities in brain regions associated with emotional empathy.
In fact, the love language of the narcissist is to get you to do all the work of the relationship. They feel “loved” when you are proving your love and loyalty. They believe you are invested into the relationship when you invest more into them than you invest in you.
"But with a narcissist, you'll always feel like you're trying to entertain them. Unfortunately for a narcissist, she says, the next person will always end up being boring because time breeds familiarity, requiring the narcissist to look for something new.
We tend to feel special when we feel loved. The problem for narcissists, though, is that they don't trust that they are really loved. Most of them have never felt loved in their lives, and so they doubt that they can actually be loved.”
Narcissists are attracted to certain types of people. Rather than weak, vulnerable people, they tend to go for the strong-willed and talented. They are also attracted to people who reflect well on themselves.
A narcissist can attach to a parent, child, spouse, friend, and/or business partner. Basically, it is anyone willing to give the narcissist an unlimited supply of attention, admiration, affection, or appreciation.
Narcissistic partners can very quickly make you feel extremely needy, and then use that against you to get everything their way. In the beginning of the relationship they give you extravagant attention, glorification, and idealization to get you hooked, and then pull it away to keep you begging for “how it used to be”.
Its no secret that a core narcissistic trait is the lack of empathy and care for others. However, people with strong narcissistic tendencies and other dark personality traits (hereafter narcissists) do sometimes act in a caring manner, or try to appear this way.
They have a genuine interest in finding a partner who is compatible with them and have no interest in misleading or exploiting anyone. Narcissists, on the other hand, want to fast-forward both emotional and physical intimacy as a way to win your trust and investment in them quickly.
For a narcissist to be happy, you'll always have to accept their version of events as the truth. Otherwise, you'll be on the receiving end of their narcissistic rage. Even if you do everything they ask, a narcissist will still try and undermine you at every opportunity.
There are anecdotal observations suggesting that the average length of a narcissistic relationship is around six months, but no empirical evidence supports this claim. Some people get married to narcissists and stay with them for years, while others leave or are left after a few weeks or months.
The cerebral cortex has also been found to be less developed in narcissists and this area is responsible for memory, emotions and behaviour. Therefore the narcissist seems to move on so fast because their emotions are not as deep as ours but also, they don't form memories in the same way the rest of us do.
Narcissists lose interest as the expectation of intimacy increases, or when they've won at their game. Many have trouble sustaining a relationship for more than six months to a few years. They prioritize power over intimacy and loathe vulnerability, which they consider weak.
One effective way that a narcissist can draw someone back into their realm is to say, “I love you.” If you're especially important to a narcissist, they'll say and do just about anything to get you back, including using those powerful three words.
"You're a bad person." "Nobody else will ever love you." "I'm the best you'll ever have." "Have fun being alone for the rest of your life."
Narcissists try to boost their self-confidence by imagining that they're completely self-sufficient and unaffected by feelings. They can't feel vulnerable. If they're hurt or upset, they lash out in anger and become condescending, pointing out the other person's flaws.
People with narcissistic personality disorder may be generally unhappy and disappointed when they're not given the special favors or admiration that they believe they deserve. They may find their relationships troubled and unfulfilling, and other people may not enjoy being around them.
The narcissist offers your pet a treat and then takes it back. The narcissist gets a payoff from seeing people and pets suffer under their control. By teasing your pet, the narcissist is also pushing your pet into snapping at them as a way to tell the narcissist to stop.
They get jealous about everything
They talk a good game, but narcissists actually have very low self-esteem. Low self-worth/confidence/esteem is at the core of a narcissism. This low sense of self naturally makes it extremely easy for them to become jealous – very jealous.