Getting chosen to be a Pallbearer is an honour more so if you are a woman. It is not common to see women carrying the casket, but that is not to say that there is anything wrong with women taking up this honourable duty in a funeral service.
Who Should Serve as Pallbearers? Traditionally, men are seen as pallbearers. But, to answer the question in the title, yes, women do the job as well. This actually depends on the discretion of the family members, or in some instances, based on who will volunteer for the duty.
However, there is no cultural or religious customs stating that women can't serve as pallbearers. The only reason why they don't do this job is that they may not be strong enough to lift the casket, which can sometimes be quite heavy. Many elaborate wooden or metal caskets can easily weigh up to 300 pounds or more.
Both men and women can be pallbearers, and many people often choose either family members or close friends of the deceased to carry the coffin. Traditionally, there are four to six pallbearers at a funeral, depending on the weight of the coffin.
Pallbearers need to dress appropriately. Unless the bereaved specify otherwise, men should wear dark, solid suits with white shirts and conservative ties, and women should wear dark pantsuits or dresses.
Pallbearers will have to carry the casket with the body inside, so they will have to transport the body's weight and the coffin. 370 to 400 pounds is the final weight that pallbearers will carry if the casket is standard sized, 200 pounds heavy, whereas the adult body is 200 pounds (male) or 170 pounds (female).
Pallbearers are usually close family members and friends. Siblings, adult children, grown grandchildren, nieces and nephews, close friends, and colleagues are all common choices for pallbearers. However, anyone can serve as a pallbearer.
Usually the head end of the coffin is the heaviest, thus the strongest two of your six pallbearers should take the handles at this end.
Or, you may have been selected because of your physical strength. Being a pallbearer requires that you help carry a heavy coffin at waist height with the help of five to seven other pallbearers. The weight of both the decedent and the casket varies but expect to help bear 300 pounds of weight or more.
Are coffins sold back to the funeral director for re-use? No. The coffin and the body inside are cremated together. There are occasions where the deceased or the family of the deceased has opted for using a cardboard coffin in which their loved one will be cremated.
In many funerals, the pallbearers are seated together in a special section of the funeral setting as a group. When most or all of the pallbearers are family members, they may choose to be seated with their family.
In most funerals, there are some common choices while selecting pallbearers. Siblings, adult children, grown-up grandchildren or close friends, colleagues or nephews and nieces are frequently selected as pallbearers. There is no written rule as to who can handle this task.
As early as the 1700s, gloves were given to pallbearers by the deceased's family to handle the casket. They were a symbol of purity, and considered a symbol of respect and honor.
Opinions differ on whether family members should be asked to be pallbearers. Some people consider it a no-no, while others are fine with including family members. It's possible that immediate family members of the deceased, like siblings or children, may be grieving too deeply to be tasked with this job.
Participating in a funeral as a pallbearer is a time-honored tradition and a sign of trust. It's both an honor and a responsibility. After all, you have been asked to accompany a dearly loved person to their final resting place, which means the family trusts and values you.
Know the weight of the person in the coffin and bear in mind that wooden coffins are also quite heavy, adding up to 20kg. If the load is more than 90kgs (14 stones) you will need six bearers. If the load is more than 125 kilos (20 stones), you should think very carefully about carrying the coffin.
Due to this heaviness, pallbearers are typically males over the age of 16. However, women can also serve as pallbearers. Those chosen are often close to the departed or the bereaved family.
Traditional pallbearers dress in modest and dark clothing. Men wear suits with ties and women wear dresses or pants suits. Women should avoid heels and wear comfortable dress shoes to avoid injury. Pallbearers will try to wear typical funeral attire, keeping the focus on the casket and the deceased.
Pallbearers are usually chosen by the closest relatives of the person who has died, and may be family members, close friends or co-workers. Although pallbearers have traditionally always been men, women are now also given the role. It is considered a great honour to be a pallbearer.
The six feet under rule for burial may have come from a plague in London in 1665. The Lord Mayor of London ordered all the “graves shall be at least six-foot deep.” The order never said why six feet. Maybe deep enough to keep animals from digging up corpses.
There is no standard for pallbearer gifts, but those who opt to provide them should make sure that the gesture is meaningful and honors the service—even if just a small token of gratitude.
As such, this number and even are more than eight people. However, six pallbearers are picked to carry the casket during a funeral service often because most caskets have three handles on each side. In most cases, pallbearers are people who have close relations with the deceased.
The pallbearers hail from the Queen's Company, the 1st Battalion Grenadier Guards. 'It's their role to protect her body, both in life and in death, remaining in the Queen's Company until King Charles decides otherwise,' explained Major Adrian Weale to the PA.
If you feel like this, or you don't want to be a pallbearer for any other reason, you don't have to accept. You can politely tell the person who has asked you that you don't want to do it, and explain your reasons.