First crushes may occur at any time, but generally start at around 10-13 years of age. They are an important step in developing normal and healthy romantic relationships, and provide opportunities to learn how to compromise and communicate.
Around the time they're able to attend elementary school, kids can experience their first crush. Some parents may feel blindsided by how early this can occur, but experts say it's perfectly normal.
You might start by explaining that their feelings are normal. You could say something like, “It's okay for you to have these feelings and to want to be around your crush.” You might also say, “At your age, I'm okay with you sitting next to your crush, holding their hand, and talking on the phone.”
Crushes often sprout from a child's attraction to authority, she said. Kids, like grown-ups, look up to people in authority, and a crush may develop "especially when that person possesses other attributes that the child thinks are important."
During puberty, it's very normal to start developing feelings that you haven't experienced before, such as feeling really attracted to someone else. This is what is commonly known as 'sexual attraction'!
Psychologically speaking, crushes occur when a person of any age projects their ideas and values onto another person whom they believe possesses certain attributes and with whom they want to be associated. Then, the person with the crush attaches strong positive feelings to this magical image that they have created.
The experience of having a crush can begin as early as preschool, and crushes can continue to occur throughout one's life. Usually crushes are one-way, though sometimes they are reciprocated. In any form, crushes are common among prepubescent kids and satisfy important needs.
In fact, experts say, age 5 or 6 is the moment when romantic love first arrives. Boys and girls begin to notice each other. They develop loyalties.
Don't make your child think she's in trouble because then she's likely to view kissing as something bad. Remind your child that kissing is reserved for family members and that she should hug her friends or give them high fives instead.
“Kids even 4 years old can have crushes on each other,” says Radcliffe. “It's just a natural development. First you love your mother and then you can love other people, even when you're a real little kid,” she says.
The most common sign of having a crush is the feeling that you have a million butterflies flying around inside you when that special someone is around. It can also feel like your heart does a leap when you see your crush and you feel warm and giddy. Do you suddenly feel nervous but excited at the same time?
It's important to consider your child as an individual. Consider their emotional maturity and sense of responsibility. For many kids, 16 seems to be an appropriate age, but it may be entirely suitable for a mature 15-year-old to go on a date, or to make your immature 16-year-old wait a year or two.
Of course, a limerence stage can last a very short or long period of time, but, on average, this state generally lasts between three months and 36 months. The more contact and sexual intimacy people have during the limerence stage, the more likely it is that the crush will fade more quickly.
Many experts agree that most kids experience their first crushes when they are 5 or 6 years old. Sometimes young puppy love is focused on a celebrity, but other times it is on a classmate. The first crush is actually considered to be a developmental milestone.
However, many boys tend to become interested in girls around the time they reach puberty, which typically occurs between the ages of 10 and 14. This is because during puberty, their bodies undergo major changes as they transition from children into adults.
Consider crushes are of two kinds – identity crushes and romantic crushes.
'Crushes come from your limbic brain, which is the part we share with animals. It's responsible for basic functions, like your heart beating and breathing in and out, but over the years humans developed a middle brain and a cortex on top,' explains Dr Blumberg.
It starts with a crush
That first spark of attraction ignites a region buried deep inside the brain called the ventral tegmental area, or VTA. Recognizing a potential reward in the making, the VTA begins producing a chemical called dopamine, often called the “feel-good” neurotransmitter.
According to a new survey of parents, age 15 is the hardest age to deal with.