Relationship insecurity can be caused by many different things, but it is often the result of feeling abandoned, neglected, or not good enough. There are signs that indicate your relationship is unhealthy and you may be feeling insecure for a reason.
Insecurity will make you internalize your thoughts and feelings. This makes you seem distant, distracted, or uninterested. None of this may be the case, but this is what your partner sees. Being insecure about sharing your feelings and needs with your partner is a barrier to having a healthy relationship.
Key points. Red flags in a relationship are intuitive indicators that something needs to be questioned. Relationship red flags include feelings of insecurity and negative feedback from one's friends and family.
The core cause of insecurities in a relationship is often a lack of self-love. If one partner holds on to harmful limiting beliefs, like being afraid of failure or thinking that they don't deserve love, they won't be able to trust completely – and trust is the foundation of any relationship.
Jealousy may be driven by low self-esteem or a poor self-image. If you don't feel attractive and confident, it can be hard to truly believe that your partner loves and values you. Other times, jealousy can be caused by unrealistic expectations about the relationship.
1. BEAUTY. Beauty is by far the biggest insecurity women report.
Not all forms fit neatly into categories either, but some of the most common types of insecurity include relationship insecurity, social insecurity, body image insecurity, job insecurity, and insecurity of basic needs.
"You may have all the trust in the world that your partner isn't going to cheat on you but still feel insecure," says Jeney. Our core insecurities, she adds, often stem from attachment wounds, which is a way to describe any time there was a significant relationship that has ruptured our trust in the past.
Most people feel insecure from time to time, but when insecurity starts to interfere with your daily life, you may want to get to the root causes. Insecurity may come from your attachment style, a personality disorder, living with anxiety, or not having emotional support.
Extreme Jealously
When jealousy creeps into a romantic relationship, it can often fester into controlling tactics to assert dominance. “Do not ignore this red flag because it could also lead to an abusive and controlling situation,” says Kelman.
Signs of Insecurity in Relationships
Incessantly checking up on your partner if you're not with them to determine their whereabouts. Not trusting your partner to stay faithful to you and constantly worrying that they're cheating on you.
Ask yourself: “Is this a familiar feeling, one I've had before?” If so, feelings of inadequacy may occur because you're often hard on yourself. Negative internal talk affects your self-esteem and breaks down your confidence. Begin by paying attention to how you talk to yourself.
What a woman feels most insecure about depends on what she values most in the relationship. However, most women will start to feel insecure when their partner disregards her opinion, doesn't respect her, or blatantly ignores her in pursuit of some “personal time”.
For many, feelings of insecurity can be resolved before they have a lasting, harmful impact. When one deals with generalized insecurity for a long period of time, however, the doubt and negative feelings experienced may have a significant effect on life.
A root fear: Overthinking stems from a particular insecurity or root fear. This insecurity may be from childhood, a past relationship, or general low self-esteem or trust issues.
Face/ Skin. One of the biggest insecurities people can develop throughout their lives is how one's face looks; acne, oily skin, moles, freckles or even scars are marks that can lead people to think they're unattractive and therefore feel insecure.