Kokuhaku 告白 This is when you “confess” your feelings for someone with the hopes of dating them. When giving the confession, it's normal to say, “tsukiatte kudasai 付き合ってください”, which means, “Please go out with me” or “Can we date?”
kokuhaku 告白 こくはく , literally means "confession", and it is done when a man or a woman declares their love to another, and hopes to begin dating that person.
When Japanese couples start going out, in a lot of cases, the relationship is preceded by what's called a “confession” or “告白” (kokuhaku) in Japanese. This is where one partner tells the other their feelings and asks to date them. This is the point that the relationship officially begins.
It's customary for Japanese women to profess their love through honmei choco, ornate handmade chocolates or expensive boxes of sweets. Women will also, sometimes begrudgingly, gift male coworkers with mini boxes of giri choco, or obligatory chocolates.
Yes. And this happens at least as often girl-to-boy as it does with the shoe on the other foot, boy-to-girl. All the joys and bitterness of young love are part of this kokuhaku (“confession”).
The word ai shiteru 愛してる is essentially the default phrase for "I love you" in Japanese. It is also the one that arguably comes closest in meaning to the English expression "I love you." The character 愛 ai literally translates to "love," typically with the connotation of romantic love.
Public Displays of Affection Aren't a Thing
You often see couples in the west showing their affection in public with a hug or a kiss. Generally speaking, Japanese couples may hold hands, but typically don't kiss in public. From this writer's perspective, there seem to be two reasons why.
Japanese are known to be shy, so once they become a couple, they flirt discreetly when in public. For example, you can see many couples walking hand-in-hand but not kissing much. Most Japanese feel embarrassed even just exchanging a small kiss on the cheek in public.
▼ The most popular answer to that question, with 52.9 percent of the vote, was the third date. So there you have it — if you want to up your chances of your love confession being met with a positive response, be sure to hold off on the first date and wait until at least the second or ideally, the third date.
In Japan, you become lovers after you “confess” your feelings to the person you like and he/she accepts you. Confession itself is not familiar in many countries, but confession is a very important step in love for Japanese people.
Hookups and Casual Dating are Taboo
While hookups in other countries are not especially celebrated, they are accepted as part of society. However in Japan hookups are seen as “filthy”, this is mostly the opinion of those that practice a religion.
“Kokuhaku” is a Japanese word that means “confession”, and is often used to refer to a confession of love. An ideal kokuhaku takes place in a romantic setting and involves one person telling the object of their affection that they have feelings for them, then asking if they can start dating exclusively.
「デートに行ってくれますか？」”deeto no itte kuremasen ka?” = Will you go on a date with me?
Legal marriage age in Japan
Until recently, the legal age for marriage was 18 for men and 16 for women, but on April 1, 2022, the age at which women can marry was raised to 18 because of the revision of the Civil Code.
In Japan, women can confess their love so it's not strange if we ask a man out but in America, it seems that women tend to wait for men to ask them out.
Japan-produced dating apps like Pairs and Omiai are geared more towards serious dating and have a large Japanese user base, which means you will mostly be using Japanese.
What are the common modern Japanese beauty standards? Modern Japanese beauty standards tend toward light, flawless skin, a slim, petite figure, slender legs, and a quiet personality—although those “standards” change over time and may be largely ignored by future generations.
Japan is often accused of having an extremely low tolerance for social touching. But in fact, they are not completely alone in this; many of their neighboring Asian countries have similar approaches.
Nevertheless, for a confession, the most basic and widespread phrase is “suki desu” (好きです, I like you), often followed up by “tsukiatte kudasai” (付き合ってください, please go out with me).
Linguistic differences aside, there is a larger cultural difference that causes a mistranslation to occur. Japanese people simply do not regularly say “I love you.” Someone might say “Aishiteru” in a sappy romantic movie, but overall the lingering impression after one professes their love in Japanese is a profound ...
Never hugging or kissing
In Japan, touching another person's body is considered rude, even with friends or family. Hugging and kissing are mostly for couples.
Japanese people tend to shy away from overt displays of emotion, and rarely smile or frown with their mouths, Yuki explained, because the Japanese culture tends to emphasize conformity, humbleness and emotional suppression, traits that are thought to promote better relationships.
It's a big deal to say 'I love you' in Japan, and Japanese people, by and large, tend to express their love verbally only on rare occasions, choosing instead to show their love through actions and gestures. That being said, it still pays to master the art of many different ways of verbally expressing your love.