Narcissists not only don't care about what the other person is trying to say, or make any effort to understand them, they often purposely misunderstand (or pretend to misunderstand) and mischaracterize the argument, focusing on using it to attack the other person to feel superior.
A narcissist will not try to understand your point of view because the truth of the matter is that they simply don't care. Don't bother engaging with a narcissist in any kind of serious argument because you will be emotionally drained and exhausted.
What happens when you tell a narcissist that they re a narcissist?
So when they encounter a piece of information about narcissism they immediately might feel exposed, ashamed, betrayed, or attacked. Moreover, they often take things very personally and think that everything is about them. So they might feel that the author is talking about them personally or calling them out.
Those who live with narcissism may find it difficult to hold positive and negative feelings for someone at the same time. As a result, things may get heated in an argument. You may experience insults, put-downs, and even mocking behaviors, like laughing as you express hurt.
Self-important and conceited, the narcissist exaggerates accomplishments, requires endless praise, and has an uncanny ability to quash the achievements of others. They lack empathy and don't seem aware that you are a whole person with your own needs.
In narcissists' efforts to avoid blame, they often combine several fake apologies at once, such as, “I am sorry if I said anything to offend you, but I have strong opinions. Maybe you're too sensitive,” or, “I guess I should tell you I am sorry.
A monumental weakness in the narcissist is the failure to look internally and flesh out what needs to be worked on. Then, of course, the next step is to spend time improving. The narcissist sabotages any possibility of looking deep within.
The easiest way to do it is to give them attention (the thing they want the most) and then take it away. Start a conversation with them and then turn your focus to another friend or colleague—the narcissist will spiral and try desperately to get their supply of compliments and attention back.
How does a narcissist react when they can't control you?
Narcissists also gaslight or practice master manipulation, weakening and destabilizing their victims; finally, they utilize positive and negative emotions or moments to trick others. When a narcissist can't control you, they'll likely feel threatened, react with anger, and they might even start threatening you.
Here are some narcissism red flags to look out for: Lacking empathy. They seem unable or unwilling to have empathy for others, and they appear to have no desire for emotional intimacy. Unrealistic sense of entitlement.