Anger and aggression are two other common initial reactions to accusations of cheating.
Cheaters may lie or deny what happened.
They might also say things to make you doubt yourself, like “You're just being paranoid,” or “That's crazy, why would you think that?” This form of deception is called “gaslighting.”
Another one of the common things cheaters say and do after being caught is pleading for forgiveness. You may see them become overly emotional, crying to show their remorse even if they're currently not overcome with emotion.
2) Cheaters tend to react with extremes
Some cheaters are the opposite. They feel horrible about getting caught and use it as evidence that they are a bad person who doesn't deserve to be happy. And who isn't good enough for their partner. Or they try to make penance with endless apologies.
A cheater, however, may get defensive because you've blown their cover, says Milrad: “It is very common for cheaters to deflect responsibility and get irritated by your questions. They often try and shut you down and even criticize you for being too controlling or suspicious.”
Cheaters actually have a deep-seated fear of betrayal themselves. They often feel suspicious and rejected in relationships and use this as an excuse to step out on their partners. Cheating gives philandering folks a feeling of power and control in their lives and relationships.
The phone is always angled away from you. They are constantly scrambling to keep the phone within reach. When bedtime rolls around, they don't put their phone on the nightstand anymore – it's always tucked under the pillow. This is a common red flag.
What hurts the most about being cheated on? There is no doubt that having someone you love and care about cheat on you is hurtful. People who have experienced infidelity report feeling betrayed, losing trust, rage, and damaged self-esteem.
Infidelity can have lasting impacts on partners and children the couple may have. Grief, brain changes, behaviors down the road, and mental health conditions such as anxiety, chronic stress, and depression can result. Some families have been able to move past infidelity with time and therapy.
Innocent people are commonly more open, because they know the truth will prove their innocence, whereas guilty people are likely to act in more fearful and evasive ways. For example, an innocent person may be more willing to cooperate with an investigation, while a guilty person may try to avoid it.
The Progression of Infidelity
Much like the stages of grief, the stages of infidelity are not always linear. For one person, it may be micro-cheating that turns into emotional infidelity, followed by physical infidelity. For another, digital infidelity may turn into physical infidelity.
Avoid dragging this matter out by giving futile explanations and creating a mile-long apology for cheating. Keep the apology short and specific, but meaningful and genuine. Also, never put blame on your other half to justify or explain cheating. It will only push them away from you – and that's the last thing you want!
Cheaters are impulsive, and can't resist taking that risk despite what it might cost them. Cheaters, like bullies, are fueled by power, and drawn to risk. This kind of behavior, however, is a reflection of something deeply rooted inside of them.
A cheater might suffer from extremely low self-esteem and a narcissistic view of seeing things. Some people have a tendency for attention-seeking and once they are satisfied with one person they might go on to another to fulfil their needs and validate themselves.
The physical signs of cheating are the most obvious. This includes spending more time with friends and less with you, avoiding sex, having a random or significantly changed schedule, and changes in their appearance.
Forensic Infidelity DNA Testing
Infidelity can be difficult to prove, but if you need confirmation of evidence for yourself or others, forensic DNA testing is the best way to do so.
For the betrayed spouse, stages of an affair being exposed can involve everything from denial, shock, reflection, depression to finally taking an upward turn.
Results of a 2005 study show that there is a significant difference between cheaters and non-cheaters when it comes to the Big Five model of personality traits. Poor self control, selfishness, anger, boredom, and attention-seeking are the most common reasons a person is unfaithful in their relationship.
Cheating on a spouse or significant other is sure to cause feelings of jealousy and hurt in the spurned partner. But men and women differ on what part of cheating they think is the worst: Men tend to be more bothered by sexual infidelity, while most women are bothered more by emotional infidelity.
Suddenly hiding financial information or being secretive about how much money they have or are spending is a classic method for cheaters to hide their actions. For example, it is common for the cheating partner to purchase their affair partner gifts, spend money on dates, and invest in weekends away.
'A phone placed face down is a known warning sign and is seen as a red flag that a person can be cheating or might be hiding something. Because it is known to cause suspicion of cheating the solution for many cheaters is to turn off their notifications or hide them to avoid questions.