You may feel numb, shocked, and fearful. You may feel guilty for being the one who is still alive. At some point, you may even feel angry at your spouse for leaving you. All of these feelings are normal.
A common theme among people who have lost their spouse is the debilitating effects of feeling entirely alone and incomplete. The sense of feeling like you have lost an essential part of yourself is both painful and disconcerting. The world suddenly looks like a different place, often odd and distanced.
Losing your spouse or partner—especially after many years of being together—can shake up your entire world. “If the main person in your life is suddenly not there, that in itself is extremely stressful. There's also the stress of restructuring your life, which has been one way for decades and now has changed,” says Dr.
Losing a spouse or partner
You may feel alone, despairing, and worried about the future. You could even feel guilty about somehow having failed to protect your partner, or angry at your loved one for leaving you.
People might feel or act differently to usual when they are grieving. They might have difficulty concentrating, withdraw and not enjoy their usual activities. They may drink, smoke or use drugs. They may also have thoughts of hurting themselves or that they can't go on.
People were at higher risk for dying of heart failure when someone very close to them died. The death of a spouse or partner increased the risk by 20%, the death of a child by 10%, and the death of a sibling by 13%, although the loss of a parent did not increase the risk of death.
Grief can be the starting point of a variety of mental illnesses, including depression, alcohol or substance use disorders, or anxiety disorders, such as PTSD, phobias, or panic disorder. Grief can also trigger the onset of bipolar disorder, often with the manic phase coming soon after the death.
Losing those fundamental feelings of safety and trust can lead to anxiety and fear. You may even feel like the world is unsafe and unpredictable or question your faith. The overwhelming stress can lead to long-term psychological trauma, and in more severe cases, post-traumatic stress disorder.
The standard grieving period can last anywhere from six to twelve months for it to cycle through. This applies to most cases of ordinary grief, with no additional complications coming into play.
Complicated grief disorder, which is also known as complicated bereavement disorder, keeps sufferers trapped in their pain and sense of loss after the death of someone they love.
A common theme among people who have lost their spouse is the debilitating effects of feeling entirely alone and incomplete. The sense of feeling like you have lost an essential part of yourself is both painful and disconcerting. The world suddenly looks like a different place, often odd and distanced.
Shock is common after the loss of a loved one. Shock symptoms can include both a bodily and emotional response in the same person. It's possible that you'll experience dizziness, nausea, confusion, numbness, or even exhaustion. Feeling stunned may cause you to doubt the veracity of what you're hearing.
Take a one-day-at-a-time approach that allows you to grieve at your own pace. Talk Out Your Thoughts and Feelings - Healing starts when you can share your grief with others. Allow yourself to talk about the death, your feelings of loss and loneliness and the special things you miss about your partner.
Widow's fire describes the (sometimes) uncontrollable and all-consuming desire for sex following bereavement.
Overall, the researchers also found that in the year after losing a spouse, men were 70% more likely to die than similarly aged men who did not lose a spouse, while women were 27% more likely to die compared to women who did not become widowed.
As the study mentioned above indicates, many people experience the “peak” of grief at about 4-6 months. It is not unusual to feel better in some ways at 6-8 weeks as you come to terms with the new reality, but also still feel very intense emotions over the next several months as you continue to process.
Depression is usually the longest and most difficult stage of grief. Depression can be a long and difficult stage in the grieving process, but it's also when people feel their deepest sadness.
Step 1: Take Care of Immediate Things
In addition to managing your grief, you will have to handle certain affairs immediately. Notifying family members, loved ones and family advisers will likely be one of the first things you must do. Decisions about organ donation and funeral arrangements will be the hardest.
In spite of the devastation of this loss, it is normal to eventually recover and be able to function again. Everyone has a unique experience and will take varying amounts of time to come to terms with the death of a spouse, but it is not typical to still experience intense grief a year or more later.
Among the strongest PTSD predictors was the respondent's relationship to the deceased. Those who lost their spouse had 9.6-greater odds of developing PTSD compared with those who lost any other loved ones, and those who lost a son or daughter had 8.7-greater odds of PTSD.
Depression isn't the only connection between grief and mental illness. In rare cases, grief can cause psychosis or the development of psychotic symptoms.
Grief and loss affect the brain and body in many different ways. They can cause changes in memory, behavior, sleep, and body function, affecting the immune system as well as the heart. It can also lead to cognitive effects, such as brain fog.
Chronic stress also is common during acute grief and can lead to a variety of physical and emotional issues, such as depression, trouble sleeping, feelings of anger and bitterness, anxiety, loss of appetite, and general aches and pains.