Having two kids is exponentially more difficult than having just one. Just when you think you've figured things out, you'll face an entirely new challenge, like trying to feed a baby with a toddler climbing on you, or changing a diaper while your previously potty-trained toddler poops in the corner.
Recent research looked at thousands of families in Denmark and America, and found that the child born second in the family is likely to be more challenging. And even more so if he's a boy, according to the study.
It's important to remember that these lowered levels of satisfaction are for the first year or two after the child's birth. The birth of the second child, however, is more likely to be harder on the father than the mother, when it comes to their feelings about their marital or cohabiting relationship.
Second child syndrome or middle child syndrome is when the second-born or middle-born child gets uncomfortable with the presence of their siblings. It can be due to the lack of importance or attention when the parents give more attention to younger children and give responsibilities to older siblings.
Two kids require more time, more attention, and more energy than one, which means you have less of all of those to spend on each other. Date nights, romantic evenings, and even casual conversations are harder to come by. You also have more things to disagree on.
Stress. A TODAYMoms.com survey of more that 7,000 mothers found that the least stressful number of kids is four, while the most stressful number is three. Scary Mommy blogger Jill Smokler told Today that she wholeheartedly agrees.
Every stage of parenting has its challenges, but one poll reveals what age most parents feel they struggled with the most.
Research has showed that, while having one child is associated with a gain in happiness, having a second is associated with a drop in happiness for mothers.
06/6Verdict. VERDICT: As per World Health Organization, a gap of at least 24 months should be there between your first and second child. By this time, the mother's body gets fully recovered from her first pregnancy as she replenishes the nutrients she lost in her first pregnancy.
Here, researchers tracked people over 20 years and found that parents were actually happier after the birth of their second baby. With their first child, life satisfaction dipped for several years, then increased to levels higher than before. But a second child steadily increased happiness.
VERDICT: As per World Health Organization, a gap of at least 24 months should be there between your first and second child. By this time, the mother's body gets fully recovered from her first pregnancy as she replenishes the nutrients she lost in her first pregnancy.
The truth is that having one child as opposed to two or more allows for a much more controlled environment, and there are also fewer relationships in the family to potentially complicate the overall family dynamic.
A gap of 3 years or more greatly reduces the chances of sibling rivalry. By this time the older child is secure in him or herself and quite independent. In addition, the mother's body is fully recovered from the challenges of pregnancy and birth of the first child.
Second-borns are often more relaxed, less driven and more creative than first-borns, possibly because they experience more relaxed, less demanding parenting. They may be more sociable, having had to learn to share parental attention from birth.
Possible benefits of a 3-year age gap
According to some research, you may have the lowest risk of labor complications when you have your second baby around three years after your first. Pregnancy may carry less risk for you and your baby.
The Pros Of Having Another Baby #1: They Will Always Have Each Other. A sibling can be a lifelong friend. Long after you're gone, the siblings will still be able to rely on each other for friendship and support. Your children will have each other for the rest of their lives.
Grow your family to at least four children! According to a study out of Australia's Edith Cowan University, parents with the most life satisfaction (which means those who are the happiest) are those that have four or more children.
Because of that long connection, she adds, siblings matter a lot for our personal growth and well-being. “Throughout the lifespan, people who have close sibling relationships have better mental health, better psychological health, and better social relationships, generally speaking.”
Is it a household of girls, a household of boys, or a mix of the two best for parents? According to a survey conducted by British parenting website Bounty, two girls are considered the best combination for parents to have a happy and harmonious family life.
Four-year-olds are usually better behaved than three-year-olds because they've developed the social skills to alter their behavior based on their situation and location. At three years old, toddlers are still learning to regulate their own emotions and have a harder time controlling their actions.
The Best And Hardest Ages
Forty percent of survey participants felt that five was the most fun age. This was thought to be down to improved communication skills and the development of a good sense of humour. The survey also found that parents had the least fun with the 10 to 12 year old children.
These little ones are developing their language, memory and imagination, and it's a time of discovery, as parents begin to see their kid's personality shine. It's also a time when both kids and parents struggle with unpredictability, expectations and boundary setting, particularly in uncertain situations.