According to the 'Holmes and Rahe stress scale', divorce is the second most stressful life event after death of a spouse. Marital separation is third. In 1967, two psychiatrists, Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe, surveyed 5,000 medical patients to study whether stress contributed to illness.
Apples to Oranges: Comparing Death and Divorce
Without a doubt, divorce is one of the hardest things most people will ever deal with. In most cases, psychologists say that divorce can't be compared to the death of a spouse because the dynamics are vastly different.
What the experts say may surprise you. Lewis Terman, Stanford University, began a study in 1921 focusing on comparing children of divorce and children whose parent died. Although Terman has passed on, his study continues. This study has found that children of divorce fare much worse than children whose parent dies.
While some may be happier after a divorce, research indicates most adults that divorce have lower levels of happiness and more psychological distress compared to married individuals. Divorce can bring up new conflicts between couples that cause more tension than when they were married.
Divorce will take you outside your comfort zone. Divorce is about change. Ideally, you started to metabolize these changes during the divorce process, and if you haven't, your life after divorce is going to be harder—not just materially but psychologically and emotionally.
Why You Might Be Happier After Divorce. Women fare better than men. A study by Kingston University in the UK found that despite the negative financial impact of divorce on women, they are generally happier than men after divorce.
Research indicates life after divorce for men is more traumatic than it is for women, taking a more significant emotional toll as well as sparking physical deterioration.
On average, children aged 6-10yrs old are least affected by divorces; however, children aged 1-2yrs old's seem to be the most affected. Every marriage goes through its good times and bad times; however, when children become involved in the equation, the stakes become even higher.
Psychologists say the potential of an emotional trauma like divorce affects kids of every age, but it is more impactful when the child is between 3 to 15 years old.
The study found that on average unhappily married adults who divorced were no happier than unhappily married adults who stayed married when rated on any of 12 separate measures of psychological well-being. Divorce did not typically reduce symptoms of depression, raise self-esteem, or increase a sense of mastery.
The first thing to know is that the grieving process is real for everyone, even those who instigated the divorce and are intent on moving forward. Grief is a natural response to any loss, regardless of the circumstances. It's also a complicated emotion, one we sometimes tell ourselves we don't have the right to feel.
The study produced results indicating that the risk of death is 23% higher for those who have gone through a divorce than those that stayed married. Researchers were surprised as they did not believe life expectancy would drop to levels comparable with smokers, heavy drinkers and the obese.
Yes, there are children who experience some negative consequences when their parents split up. They feel unhappy, they do worse in school and so on. But there are also children who are happier, healthier and even safer after a divorce. It often comes down to what their home life is like before and after the divorce.
Loneliness. Many people say that the loneliness is the hardest part. It takes a very long time to get used to being single. Not only have you lost your partner, and perhaps your best friend, but you have possibly also lost your in-laws and the extended family that you married into.
While a divorce can be a huge emotional blow, staying in a bad marriage can be even worse. It is not fair to yourself to stay in a relationship that is not working. Life is too short to stay in an unhealthy relationship.
Many people consider the separation phase to be the most difficult. This is the time between when you decide to get divorced and the date you actually get divorced. This period often presents the most uncertainties about child support, visitation, alimony, division of assets, and more.
The average age for a couple entering their first divorce is 30 years old. And 60% of divorces involve spouses between the ages of 25 and 39. Women are more likely to file for divorce than men.
Divorce alone doesn't fit the clinical definition of a traumatic event. But it's possible that for some people, going through a divorce may lead to trauma-related symptoms. Divorce can be painful, even when you want it. It's natural and valid to feel hopeless, sad, or let down if you're going through a divorce.
According to statistics, the average age of divorce is 30. However, married couples between the ages of 20 to 25 are 60% likely to get a divorce. Overall, 40% to 50% of all marriages in the US end in divorce. However, divorce doesn't have age restrictions, and it can happen to anyone of any age.
Compared to younger adults, the 50+ group accounts for proportionately more of all divorces in the U.S. Back in 1990, fewer than 1 in 10 people who got divorced were 50 or older. By 2010, the rate was about two and a half times that—1 in every 4 people. What's happening to all those older people after they divorce?
Which Months Do Divorce Filings Peak? Divorce rates peak in March and August. There are a number of reasons these two months see a large increase in divorce and separation. People are less likely to divorce during the winter holidays since these events revolve around time spent with family.
You might be thinking that it's too late, but it's never too late. You can do anything you set your mind too.
Lack of Commitment Is the Most Common Reason for Divorce
In fact, 75% of individuals and couples cited lack of commitment as the reason for their divorce.
Some realize that they made the decision impulsively. They realize they didn't take enough time to think through all of the possible outcomes. They may also regret how the divorce itself was conducted, their decisions to fight for unimportant things, or making the process more conflicted than it needed to be.
Divorce can shake the ability of a woman to be true to herself. Women feel that their identity is lost because of their usual association as being wives and mothers. In lieu of this light, women should recognize unique gifts that set them apart and place emphasis on empowering them.