And when it's more than an occasional impolite gesture — when it becomes a constant, chronic part of your communication style, like nodding or smiling — interrupting can be a toxic habit, poisoning any exchange you have with frustration and resentment. Admitting you're an interrupter is a step in the right direction.
Many people think that interrupting is rude, but it's only truly impolite when you are interrupting in order to change the topic or disagree with the other person before they've completely finished their idea.
You appear egotistical and seem to believe the other person is inferior. Interrupting implies that you deem your words more worthy than the remainder of what the other person has to say. You appear uncontrolled. People will view you as not having the self-discipline to avoid being rude and egotistical.
Even if you think you're interrupting for a good reason – to ask a relevant question, offer your solution to a problem, or show that you understand – it's rude and it almost always negatively affects the interaction. Interrupting tells the person speaking that you don't care what they have to say.
Some people interrupt because they are so excited about what you are saying they cannot wait until you finish to contribute their thoughts and feelings. Likewise, many chronic interrupters have no idea they are even doing it. To them, interrupting other people is what makes the conversation interesting and dynamic.
Behavioral scientist Alan Keen believes the stress and overload that comes from constantly being expected to multitask is causing an “epidemic of rage.” Interruption and task switching raises stress hormones and adrenaline, which tends to make us more aggressive and impulsive.
Below are some examples of what you can say: “If you don't mind letting me finish, then I'd love to hear what you have to say.” “Please allow me to finish.” “I'm sure you didn't mean it, but you just interrupted me, which makes me feel as though you don't want to hear what I have to say.”
Yes. It is rude. If that should happen when someone is speaking to me, I excuse myself first. It's best to pay attention to whomever addressed you 1st.
Second, it most likely damages the rest of the conversation by changing the dynamics—no longer equal, as the interrupter has exercised dominance—as well as the emotional context; the interrupted person may well feel belittled and offended, giving rise to anger, resentment and unwillingness to be open from that point.
Interrupting can be very hurtful and unhealthy relationship behavior. But what is really going on? Your partner might be in a bad mood, frustrated, resorting to bullying, or simply unaware. Interruption might be part of someone's habitual style of talking.
“When someone interrupts you, blocks you, or otherwise thwarts your intended action, it's natural to feel upset,” says Dr. Judith White, associate professor at Dartmouth's Tuck School of Business. “This is a basic instinct and you will always have a flash of annoyance.”
We're psychologically wired to tie up loose ends. Interrupting can feel good because it allows you to neatly tie up a thought that might get lost or transformed as the conversation continues. Often, when someone else is speaking, we're not listening so much as waiting for our turn.
Interrupting is rude when it gets in the way of the speaker transmitting their message effectively (completely, concisely, clearly). As a shorthand, interrupting is rude if the interruption is about you, your ideas, your wants rather than about what the person is trying to communicate.
In this one moment, this point of interruption, we lose our focus and our progress stops. Our attention is ripped away, our brain abruptly shifts, our momentum is gone, and with it any feeling of satisfaction. No matter how brief the interruption, no matter how quick the “Hello, how's it going?” the damage is done.
Interrupting someone is a bad habit we can all fall into, often, without realizing it. Yes, it's rude, frustrating and can lead to areas of unproductive behaviors and relationships. Do you know someone that constantly interrupts while you are talking?
The term “conversational narcissist” was coined by sociologist Charles Derber who describes the trait of consistently turning a conversation back to yourself. A balanced conversation involves both sides, but conversational narcissists tend to keep the focus on themselves.
Ghosting happens when someone cuts off all online communication with someone else, and without an explanation.
Some of the most common reasons for interrupting include: Lack of self awareness: Not realizing you interrupt others. Fear of forgetting what you want to say (stemming from impatience; nervousness; or planning what to say next, instead of actively listening).
Stonewalling, one of the Four Horsemen, is Dr. John Gottman's term for one or both partners shutting down when feeling overwhelmed during conflict. Rather than confronting the issue, someone who is stonewalling will be unresponsive, making evasive maneuvers such as tuning out, turning away, or acting busy.
You can't change the interrupting behavior overnight, but saying “Sorry, I didn't mean to cut you off,” is actually a critical first step. By doing that, you are signaling that you recognize the bad habit and want to improve the behavior.