Crushes don't have a set time limit. A crush might be over in a week, or it still might be holding strong a decade later. The #1 thing that determines whether a crush ends or not is whether the person with the crush acts on it.
Developing a crush is a normal, and oftentimes healthy, part of life. A crush does not necessarily mean that there is anything wrong with your current relationship or that it needs to end simply because you experience such feelings.
Even though it can end with a broken heart, the drama that leads up to it is exciting and thrilling. But what is too long to have a crush? In reality, according to psychologists, a typical crush usually lasts for FOUR MONTHS. If the feeling persists, what you feel is what we like to call, “being in love.”
If you have liked someone for 3 years and you have met them and you know them, you are probably “in love” as that does not fade or go away.
A crush has no set time limit or expiry date
It can last hours, days, weeks, months, or perhaps, even years; there is no set timeframe for a crush. A crush is a fantasy of what you imagine that person to be like—you like the idea of that person.
Tennov suggests that limerence can last a few weeks to several decades, the average ranging from 18 months to three years. The length can depend on whether feelings are reciprocated, which can make limerence linger.
You could be suffering from Limerence — a cognitive state of obsession and infatuation. You may be fixated with having your feelings reciprocated. You refuse to give up because you know it's meant to be. Very common in the world of Twin Flames.
Generally speaking, you should want to be around the person you're in love with. "You want to be with them more and get to know them better," says Firstein. Crushes fade and you may get bored after spending time with the same person, but with love, you're never disinterested.
While some crushes dissipate within days or hours even, others can last a lifetime too. So, yes, a crush can last for years, 7 or even lesser.
The reason you can't get over your crush is that you have accidentally trained yourself into a mental habit of constantly seeking them. The excitement and euphoria of that initial romantic connection makes them the central focus of your life, and because it feels so intoxicating and good, you don't resist.
All of those questioned were aged 18 or over, with the average age of respondents levelling out at 37. Initially, respondents were asked to reveal how many crushes they had experienced in their lifetime so far, to which the average answer was a whopping 17.
Life crushes are totally normal (as are regular crushes, incidentally). They can also tell you a lot about how you're feeling about yourself and your life.
So why do some of us do this? Obsessive crushes aren't just frustrating - they could be a type of addiction, according to researchers. Dr Gery Karantzas, an Associate Professor at Deakin University studying love and relationships, said some of us get an emotional "reward" from fantasising about a crush.
If you would describe your situation with your crush as "it's complicated," it may be time to move on. As Laurie Berzack, MSW, matchmaker and dating coach, tells Bustle, this usually means that you're not getting the respect, attention, and level of commitment that you're probably looking for.
Another way to figure out if it is a crush or an obsession is to think about a life without that specific person. People with crushes will often be able to “bounce back” after, but people with obsessions will feel as if they can not live without that person in their grasp.”
They give you lots of compliments. Your crush will want to make you feel good if they like you back. Once your crush knows that you like them, they may feel more comfortable saying nice things about you. When you're talking to your crush, listen if they say anything that makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside.
Infatuation is often a fantasy-based, passionate longing for someone else. It can prevent you from acknowledging their weaknesses, and may even land you in an unhealthy situation. Love is often based in reality and is fed on closeness and knowledge of the other person.
The reason why crushes feel so intense is that the person with the crush craves deep intimacy with their object. It's the kind of closeness that is difficult (but not impossible) to come by in friendship. Imagining that intimacy is euphoric. But with true intimacy, you get to see the best and worst in someone.
How Long Does It Take to Get Over a Crush? Mild crushes can fade within a few weeks. Serious crushes are generally limited to the early stages of a relationship, or two years if no relationship develops. If your crush lingers for longer than two years, it's technically classified as limerence.
A lifelong crush: The person who you will always have a crush on no matter your relationship status.
3. Infatuation. Now that you know for sure you have a crush on this person, next comes infatuation (Connolly, et al., 2013). And for many of us, this is the best part about having a crush because when you're infatuated with someone, your whole world starts to change.
A crush and love can both last years. Both love and crushes can have a similar effect at the start at least. You might stay awake at night thinking about the person, wake up thinking about them and go sleep with them still in your head. They can be all consuming and take over your every thought and action.