It can be appropriate (as you don't always have to the last person to text), but in general unless someone has done something R E A L L Y egregious, if you're just DONE talking, it can be a nice thing to let someone know you're done talking for a bit.
Yes, it's a bit lazy and can feel somewhat cruel if you've already established mutual interest or even commitment, but leaving a message “on read” is the non-confrontational method of “letting someone down easy.” Unfortunately, not responding is commonly done to get across the message of disinterest.
“Keeping your text 'on read' message is a manipulative tactic used to get people to feel off-center," Keegan tells Elite Daily. "When someone's doing that on purpose, it's because they're manipulative.” He adds that it can even lead to obsession.
In internet slang, a person is left on read when a recipient has read, but not responded to, a sender's message. The expression is often used to express feeling ignored.
Being left on unread is much worse of the two because it will keep them wondering. They will keep hoping. Be anxious and will stress them out, even a bit depressed why you don't open the message. This may not be a rude may, but it will drive the other person crazy because it just shows you don't care at all.
“Hey, sorry. I definitely saw and acknowledge your text message, but currently I am incapable of human interaction because I am busy questioning and fearing the state of the world.
If You Get Left On Read For A Few Hours
Wait a full 24 hours before you send a follow-up text. “It'll be interpreted as you having an independent life, as well as being someone with emotional health [and] self-discipline,” she says.
Being left on unread is much worse of the two because it will keep them wondering. They will keep hoping. Be anxious and will stress them out, even a bit depressed why you don't open the message. This may not be a rude may, but it will drive the other person crazy because it just shows you don't care at all.
Ignoring messages is frowned upon in these always-on times. At its most egregious, dropping out of communication is condemned as “ghosting,” which, in the years since the term became widespread, has become a deadly sin of digital communications.
Yes, it's very rude. Because you are not listening to that person and don't even try to hide it (it's impossible to fully listen and text at the same time). Also because you are avoiding eye contact, which is rude by itself. It's like someone is talking to you and you are turning your head to the other side.
Reply within 30–60 minutes to play it a little cool.
While it's okay to reply later if you're actually busy, purposefully waiting to text somebody might feel disrespectful if you're available. If you had to make the person wait for more than an hour, offer them an apology and explain what kept you from messaging them.
Keeping their receipts off ultimately removes any pressure that would be present otherwise. I also talked to Nicole Richardson, licensed marriage and family therapist, who agrees that people who leave their read receipts off like having the ability to think and mull over their response before answering.
Like the silent treatment, ghosting over text is a form of emotional manipulation, and can be very toxic. “Just because someone didn't get back to you in a manner that you consider timely is not a good reason to ignore them as punishment. It is immature behavior that starts a cycle of toxicity,” warns Resnick.
Giving someone silent treatment is a form of manipulation. The silent treatment can be used to modify behavior. Being ignored has a huge effect on a person's mental state, so they're willing to do nearly anything to regain the manipulator's attention.
And so we kind of end up where we've started: Yup, ignoring texts is rude. But there are lots of reasons to do so that may leave one without fault. So let's set some ground rules to make it easier in the future. You shouldn't ignore a text from a friend or family member.
So, despite being a bit shady, both experts agreed that leaving someone on read can definitely work to make you seem more desirable — but it can be a mixed bag further down the line. Keegan explains that, as a seduction strategy, keeping someone on read can work.
The primary reason behind this is the fact that it is a form of rejection, regardless of how minor it may be. The human brain takes rejection as the same way it would a physical injury, thus creating a resentment for the person who read your message, but didn't feel it was appropriate or worth their time to respond.
Instead of beating yourself up or getting upset because you didn't receive an immediate response, think positively. However, if your message is left on read for more than eight hours, then it might be time to start panicking. Article continues after video.
Ghosting happens when someone cuts off all online communication with someone else, and without an explanation. Instead, like a ghost, they just vanish.
DON'T Double Text
Because when you're dropping an additional text or twenty after having been left on read one time, you're risking yourself to be seen-zoned yet again. And this time, it would hurt more. Don't haste into it, for the last thing you'd want to come across is as a creep or desperate.
Not getting messages has the opposite effect. We feel invalidated, unimportant, and excluded. This is why you feel so bad when someone doesn't respond to your texts. Someone who leaves your message on 'Seen' and doesn't respond is especially cruel.
When is it okay to send a text or an email? "As a general rule, you shouldn't text somebody after 9 p.m. It may be seen as an intrusion of privacy, or they may feel you're inserting a sense of urgency that doesn't need to be there.
A General Rule of Thumb
A text should be answered within a couple of hours when there is not a time restraint. Keep in mind that if someone is working or exercising or basically out in the field, it may take longer for them to respond.
Most of the time, when a guy doesn't respond to a text immediately, he's just busy. Either he is busy with work, or maybe he's visiting family. He could also be running some household errands. Give him some time, and he'll get back to you.