Is It Okay to Smile at a Funeral? It's not only okay to smile at a funeral but it's also encouraged, especially when greeting the bereaved. Seeing someone smile at us can help lift our spirits. It's also a nonverbal way of showing support.
"Talking or being on your phone during the service is one of the most disrespectful things you could do at a funeral," says Myka Meier, Beaumont Etiquette founder and etiquette expert. It's important to be as present as possible. "Silence your phone, shut off your phone, or even just leave it behind.
It's possible to be both angry and happy, sad and relieved, frustrated and grateful — all at the same time. It's not wrong, it's just the way we are wired. Our bodies and minds find a way to balance out emotions, striving to find the good in every situation. Perhaps it's a coping mechanism of sorts.
It is generally not appropriate to smile in pictures at a funeral. A funeral is a somber and respectful occasion, and smiling in pictures may be seen as inappropriate or disrespectful.
It is customary to show your respects by viewing the deceased if the body is present and the casket is open. You may wish to say a silent prayer for, or meditate about, the deceased at this time. In some cases the family may escort you to the casket. The length of your visit at the wake is a matter of discretion.
You are not required to actually view the body at a funeral viewing. Many people are a bit uncomfortable with the idea of attending a viewing, but keep in mind that funeral viewing etiquette does not require you to actually look at or spend time with the deceased if you are not comfortable doing so.
However, many believe that taking funeral selfies and even posting these photos to social media is a way to both grieve a loss and share a human connection. Some religions and cultures actually encourage picture-taking at funerals and memorials.
Is it normal not to cry? It is perfectly normal not to cry when someone dies. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, and everyone deals with loss in their own way. It doesn't mean that you don't care, that you are cold, or that you are broken in any way.
If you are dreading the moment, you are not alone. You may have heard that public speaking, along with death, are mentioned by many as their biggest fears. So talking at a funeral, where the two come together, is a very brave act indeed!
Wearing dark grey or deep blue is just as appropriate as black, while brown and lighter greys are suitable for the vast majority of funeral services. However, unless specifically requested by the deceased or their family, you should avoid any bright colors such as yellows, oranges, pinks, and reds.
Attending a visitation can be the hardest part for people to attend, because it involves talking to the deceased's family. A good recommendation is to say something simple such as “I am sorry about your loss”, especially if there are many other guests waiting to share their condolences.
In these cases, touching the corpse in the casket might disturb its presentation, so some types of caskets may have a protective glass pane may installed to prevent this. Another exception will be if the deceased's family has asked you not to.
Benefits of Open Casket
Allows friends and family members to kiss the deceased goodbye one last time. Everyone can take comfort in seeing the deceased looking beautiful and at peace.
While shorts are never appropriate, for men or women, and miniskirts are frowned upon; bare legs are acceptable if your skirt or dress falls to your knee.
At the traditional funeral most Australians are familiar with, it is respectful to wear smart, well-pressed clothes in a dark colour. Black has long been typically worn by mourners at a traditional funeral, but dark shades such as navy or grey are also appropriate. A smart work suit or outfit is usually acceptable.
The general rule of funerals is that the family members and those closest to the deceased will sit in the front few rows. Unlike a wedding there is no particular side you need to sit on. Sit towards the middle or the back, and try to stay in one place quietly.
The speech is ideally given by someone who knew the person well enough to gather and share memories and highlights of his/her life. Sometimes the choice is obvious within the family. There is often one person who seems to be the unofficial family spokesperson.
The front rows are for the immediate family so sit nearer the back if you did not know the person very well. However, if there are few mourners present then sit nearer to the front. It does not matter which side of the 'aisle' you sit.